The following are actual announcements taken from church bulletins:
This afternoon there will be a meeting in the south and north ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.
Tuesday at 4:00P.M. there will be an ice cream social. All ladies giving milk, please come early.
Wednesday, the ladies liturgy society will meet. Mrs. Johnson will sing, "Put Me In My Little Bed" accompanied by the pastor.
Thursday at 5:00 P.M. there will be a meeting of the little mothers club. All those wishing to become little mothers, please meet the minister in his study.
This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Johnson to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.
The service will come to a close with "Little Drops of Water". One of the ladies will start quietly and the rest of the congregation will join in.
On Sunday, a special collection will be taken to defray the expense of a new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the carpet, come forward and get a piece of paper.
The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind and they may be seen in the church basement on Friday afternoon.
The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Belser. The sin of Rev. & Mrs. Julius Belser.
The sermon this morning will be on adultery. The special song will be "Why Not Tonight">
This afternoon there will be a meeting in the south and north ends of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.
Tuesday at 4:00P.M. there will be an ice cream social. All ladies giving milk, please come early.
Wednesday, the ladies liturgy society will meet. Mrs. Johnson will sing, "Put Me In My Little Bed" accompanied by the pastor.
Thursday at 5:00 P.M. there will be a meeting of the little mothers club. All those wishing to become little mothers, please meet the minister in his study.
This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs. Johnson to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.
The service will come to a close with "Little Drops of Water". One of the ladies will start quietly and the rest of the congregation will join in.
On Sunday, a special collection will be taken to defray the expense of a new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the carpet, come forward and get a piece of paper.
The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind and they may be seen in the church basement on Friday afternoon.
The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Belser. The sin of Rev. & Mrs. Julius Belser.
The sermon this morning will be on adultery. The special song will be "Why Not Tonight">
deleted_user
I can see the humor.
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