My husband has some very infuriating behaviours.
He needs to talk to me about everything all the time.
He obsesses verbally and internally rather than taking action.
He will not listen to or accept anything other than his own views.
He wants everything done for him and in a very particular way.
He constantly asks me to do things for him that arn’t necessary.
He is obsessed with his health. Constantly getting xrays, tests, scans and procedures.
He is obsessed with material things.
He buys a lot of things
He hoards
He piles his possessions up around his side of the bed and in the spare room, lounge room, shed,
He wont store them properly and no one can touch or move his things.
If I move things to clean he becomes extremely anxious. Instead of looking and organising he shouts and demands my help to find things that are right infront of him.
He is extremely disorganised but blames and accuses others when he cant find things or time manage
I have to organise him and get him off to work like the children when they were young.
He is unable to manage his time daily to accommodate getting ready for work and organising food.
If any unexpected or extra task arises he becomes anxious and angry.
He constantly needs my attention, approval and assistance.
He expects me to be focused on him and available for him at all times.
When we are apart he calls me 5-10- 30 times a day.
If I fail to comply he becomes aggressive.
He has no consideration of others.
He is very obsessed with what “people” think of him. (us)
He is rude and mean to people he thinks are less important than him.
He hates children
He is very possessive of his belongings.
He treats me as though I am one of his possessions.
He is verbally abusive daily if I don’t conform to his demands.
He occasionally becomes physically abusive if I argue or fight back.
He acts as though he is superior to everyone.
He often rolls his eyes and scoffs and says derogatory things.
He is judgemental
He constantly criticizes everyone and everything.
He doesn’t like to share
He gets into a rage if anything goes wrong and will not consider alternatives.
He cannot problem solve
He constantly micro manages my use of the cars.
He talks to me like I cannot be trusted to perform any tasks properly or safely.
it is actually him that has backed the cars into things many times.
It is him that injures himself and never completes a task in a timely fashion.
He is constantly late.
He has been fired
He has lost his licence
He constantly digresses and obsesses over irrelevant things when there are obvious priorities at hand.
He will never help me.
He will never give me credit
He wont listen
He sabotages my fun, interests, friendships, alone time, education, social life
He becomes unstable when I separate and cut off contact.
His behaviour has changed me.
His relentless harassment and judgement made me with withdrawn and depressed.
I gave up trying to have any independent thought.
He does not leave me alone long enough to do anything.
I don’t try to study or do anything while he is around because the constant interuptions.
He always states the obvious like he is a genius.
He struggles with the smallest of tasks.
When he does manage to complete a few basic tasks he acts like he has cured cancer.
He bought a new house around the corner rather than help me organise this house to be sold.
He wont move his personal possessions into the house until he deems it perfect.
He finds every excuse to stay at my house.
I cant be trusted to move his things.
He constantly tricks me into doing something for him that turns into days of obsessing with out action.
He obsesses and takes forever to do everything and he expects me to be by his side listening intently and watching every movement in case he needs assistance, (that he will then criticize.)
When I make plans for myself he begs to be included, promises not to interfere then once we are on the way he demands me to change my plans to accommodate anything that he can think of along the way that he wants or needs. I fi don’t give in he has tantrums and becomes aggressive.
He does what ever he has to too get control of me.
Any resistance from me is always met with a greater force from him.
I cant beat him by force but I can out smart him.
I wanted to move out of this small town and closer to civilisation.
He didn’t want to down size or pay extra.
I wanted to buy a city or beach crash pad
He bought a second house in this small town to make that impossible.
My house is in my name.
Soon it will be sold.
He senses that the power is shifting now.
He senses that i have reserves of strength he didn’t know exsisted
He is starting to realise that I can make things happen with out him.
Hes wondering how long I have been faking submissiveness.
He is starting to regret his choices
He can see im disconnected
He wants to change and get help but the narcissism wont let him admit any fault.
I keep supporting him in this transition
I keep soothing him and telling him it will be ok
As soon as my house sells I will be gone.
I will soon have control of my assets, time, mind, body and soul!
He needs to talk to me about everything all the time.
He obsesses verbally and internally rather than taking action.
He will not listen to or accept anything other than his own views.
He wants everything done for him and in a very particular way.
He constantly asks me to do things for him that arn’t necessary.
He is obsessed with his health. Constantly getting xrays, tests, scans and procedures.
He is obsessed with material things.
He buys a lot of things
He hoards
He piles his possessions up around his side of the bed and in the spare room, lounge room, shed,
He wont store them properly and no one can touch or move his things.
If I move things to clean he becomes extremely anxious. Instead of looking and organising he shouts and demands my help to find things that are right infront of him.
He is extremely disorganised but blames and accuses others when he cant find things or time manage
I have to organise him and get him off to work like the children when they were young.
He is unable to manage his time daily to accommodate getting ready for work and organising food.
If any unexpected or extra task arises he becomes anxious and angry.
He constantly needs my attention, approval and assistance.
He expects me to be focused on him and available for him at all times.
When we are apart he calls me 5-10- 30 times a day.
If I fail to comply he becomes aggressive.
He has no consideration of others.
He is very obsessed with what “people” think of him. (us)
He is rude and mean to people he thinks are less important than him.
He hates children
He is very possessive of his belongings.
He treats me as though I am one of his possessions.
He is verbally abusive daily if I don’t conform to his demands.
He occasionally becomes physically abusive if I argue or fight back.
He acts as though he is superior to everyone.
He often rolls his eyes and scoffs and says derogatory things.
He is judgemental
He constantly criticizes everyone and everything.
He doesn’t like to share
He gets into a rage if anything goes wrong and will not consider alternatives.
He cannot problem solve
He constantly micro manages my use of the cars.
He talks to me like I cannot be trusted to perform any tasks properly or safely.
it is actually him that has backed the cars into things many times.
It is him that injures himself and never completes a task in a timely fashion.
He is constantly late.
He has been fired
He has lost his licence
He constantly digresses and obsesses over irrelevant things when there are obvious priorities at hand.
He will never help me.
He will never give me credit
He wont listen
He sabotages my fun, interests, friendships, alone time, education, social life
He becomes unstable when I separate and cut off contact.
His behaviour has changed me.
His relentless harassment and judgement made me with withdrawn and depressed.
I gave up trying to have any independent thought.
He does not leave me alone long enough to do anything.
I don’t try to study or do anything while he is around because the constant interuptions.
He always states the obvious like he is a genius.
He struggles with the smallest of tasks.
When he does manage to complete a few basic tasks he acts like he has cured cancer.
He bought a new house around the corner rather than help me organise this house to be sold.
He wont move his personal possessions into the house until he deems it perfect.
He finds every excuse to stay at my house.
I cant be trusted to move his things.
He constantly tricks me into doing something for him that turns into days of obsessing with out action.
He obsesses and takes forever to do everything and he expects me to be by his side listening intently and watching every movement in case he needs assistance, (that he will then criticize.)
When I make plans for myself he begs to be included, promises not to interfere then once we are on the way he demands me to change my plans to accommodate anything that he can think of along the way that he wants or needs. I fi don’t give in he has tantrums and becomes aggressive.
He does what ever he has to too get control of me.
Any resistance from me is always met with a greater force from him.
I cant beat him by force but I can out smart him.
I wanted to move out of this small town and closer to civilisation.
He didn’t want to down size or pay extra.
I wanted to buy a city or beach crash pad
He bought a second house in this small town to make that impossible.
My house is in my name.
Soon it will be sold.
He senses that the power is shifting now.
He senses that i have reserves of strength he didn’t know exsisted
He is starting to realise that I can make things happen with out him.
Hes wondering how long I have been faking submissiveness.
He is starting to regret his choices
He can see im disconnected
He wants to change and get help but the narcissism wont let him admit any fault.
I keep supporting him in this transition
I keep soothing him and telling him it will be ok
As soon as my house sells I will be gone.
I will soon have control of my assets, time, mind, body and soul!
Colleen31
i deal with the same thing, my husband is also diganosed as bi polar as well. it is very hard to deal with and hard to understand. my husband had a pretty bad childhood, so at a young age he had to be tough and think he was better than anyone and everyone because his family treated him so badly. all i can tell you is, stay strong.
caneglect
Jeez, he sounds like my daughter, I feel for you, he needs meds and some intensive counseling, STAY FOCUSED do not lose sight of yourself (I feel your pain.) Hang in there and take care of yourself.
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