I was wondering what your support system is? You probably won't be connecting with your nephew as he's not in your area so who is there for you? Friends, support group, etc? We all need people we can look to for support in our lives, especially at a time like this. I wish you comfort and peace this evening and a good nights rest. Hugs Anna

Thanks Anna, I mostly pray and talk to my mom when I'm alone. There is a clerk at a Walgreens store across the street from where we lived. My mom used to talk to her when she went shopping there. The clerk is an older woman who is very nice and trys to help customers who come in the store looking for something, especially the seniors. She knew about my moms illness and asked about her. When my mom died I would go in an talk to her some. I am also reading a book on grief work and I listen to the radio alot or have the tv on. I thought about going to a church but there is none nearby and I am not much of the church going person. I have some health issues that restrict my traveling, I don't drive or have someone to drive me. The crematory people had to come to me to sign the papers and get their money.

I am so sorry that you are feeling so bad. I too at times feel completely alone. I have no family anywhere near me and I have 6 siblings, but it seems we are not connecting as we should be since mom died and I know this would upset mom. Have you tried grief counseling? I am asking because I have not but am going to call Hospice tomorrow. Mom was cared for by Hospice for a short time in Indiana but they will let me go to a group here. Wishing you some peace. Lots of gentle hugs, Sharon

I have thought about grief counseling but I have difficulty traveling, I have had congested heart failure last year. I am on medication but my feet and ankles swellup if I don't elevate my feet the evening before. I don't drive and have to take public transportation if I go anywhere. The crematory that took care of my mom's arrangements, came and picked up her body at the nursing home, almost right after she died. They are outside the city and the call to them is long distance. The times I've talked to them they put me on hold or say they are busy and will call me back. I was told be a medical social worker that found them for me that the provided grief counseling, I don't think they even know how to treat people.

Hi Donna, we can relate. The grieving, for me anyway, seems to be very cyclic. I cry for a week, then I don't for a week, etc. The one thing I have allowed myself to do is to "just go with it". If you could have seen me, standing in the middle of Walmart, trying to pick out a birthday card for my Aunt (my Mother's sister). My Mom had just died 2 weeks prior and I decided to get her a card "from" my Mother. I wrote in the card as if it were my Mother talkng to her. Needless to say, my Aunt cried through the entire thing. Sorry, got off track, my point is, the emotion came over me in Walmart and it was in the middle of Walmart where I just stood and cried. And you know what, I didn't care. I didn't need to explain my grief to anyone. IF anyone had inquired about my red eyes and nose, I would have simply told them my Mom had just passed away and trying to pick out a card for someone was difficult. No benefit in lying about it, right?

As for being alone - that's another whole story. Are you seeing a grief counselor? Sounds like you should. Or, if you have a local "hospice" group they often have grief classes. Even if your nephew were nearby, my guess is you would still be struggling as you are because your nephew can't understand how you feel - it wasn't his Mother. In the mean time, and for as long as you need it, WE, all of us here, TOTALLY understand every single thing you are going through, the things you think about, worry about, etc. We've encountered all of them. Take care and hugs to you.

Donna, Hi .. I felt so sad when I read what you wrote.. I hope you will feel like you can write me anytime.. I also lost my Mommy in Dec. and even though I have people around me I feel alone..Please know you have friends here who care.I really do care Love D

Mother loss is so hard. I was OK for two weeks, then started crying again. It's hard. The pain can come at anytime. I almost started crying on the way to work this morning but stopped myself; but I need a good cry. I have come close in public and wouldnt care if I did. Always know you can come here.