Hi there, I'm so sorry you lost your Mum, and so recently. It's the hardest thing, and everyone says it's such a blessing to have your children, and it is - but it also leaves you with very little space or time to grieve, and as Mothers I think we feel guilty. My children were very little when I lost Mum, and I didn't really allow myself to grieve and it has really complicated and prolonged the journey for me. You are grieving the loss of your Mother, it's ok for your children to see this, you are still there with them, they will learn what grief looks like, and that you survive it, really valuable life lessons for kids. Now is a time to be very kind and gentle to yourself - you are in the depths of your grief, and it feels like you will never be ok again - we've all been there. Gather in any support that you can, friends or family that can help with the kids - to allow you the space you need - don't be afraid to let people know that you are no ok and you do need help and support. Often we put on a brave face and people don't know how much we need them. Sometimes if we don't have much support around us, counselling can really help provide that space to talk and make sense of our grief. Everything you are feeling is normal, the overwhelm, the anxiety, the crying, it's very frightening, but it does pass in time x HUGS to you

Katyc77
Thank you it has been a very long road I seem to be on I know it has been extremely hard for my two boys I have not been there for them in 12yrs 10 months and 12 days when I lost my dad my mom tried so hard to m a key me realize what I was doing not only to me but my boys I tried to drowned my sorrows any why I could I would work about 70 hours a week then start to the bar. I realized I could not drink they way I was it was going to kill me I finally got sober in 2009 when my mom passed the first thing I wanted was a drink but I am terrified to do it which I think is a good thing my children don't need to see me that way again I just don't know how to go a day with out hurting it feels like my heart is being ripped out of my chest and my sister kind of depends on me to be there for her my oldest brother that I looked up to since I was very young told me he never wanted to see me again I really do need time to myself but don't know how to do it yet thank you so much HUGS to you

I'm very sorry for your loss. Nobody can tell you how to feel, or how to grieve. Everyone deals with grief differently, and heal at there own unique pace. I was really close to my Moma too, she was my best friend. My Moma passed away May 21, 2009, she was only 59 yrs old. There isn't a day goes by that I don't think about or miss her. This website is really what helped me get through the difficult times. You will make a lot of wonderful friends , and people aren't hear to judge or criticize you. You can message me anytime. Hugs and Prayers to you and your family.

I understand how you feel. I lost my mother unexpectedly in December 2015. You can never prepare for this. I never questioned my faith, or beliefs or life until I lost my mother. I ache for her everyday. I cry everyday for her and rarely can find any peace in my losing her. It has been a struggle for 4 months now. There is just me and my brother as her children and we have been trying to support each other through this but we grieve differently. I have friend that I talk to who have lost a parent but they are much further along than I am in the grief process as their parent passed many years ago. I dont know how to accept or get through losing my mother. most days Im at a loss. I keep images of her everywhere I go in items of hers or pictures. I really want to just be ok. Maybe I can help someone else in the same grief as I and they can help me understand and get through it as well. Lean on those around you. It does help and of course those who know your pain. Im a good listener too. Thoughts are with you and your family in your loss.

I don't understand why it seems to be getting harder for me. When I lost my dad almost 13 yrs ago I just went into a deep depression and it was just before September 2015 I thought things where getting a little bit better then I became very I'll and almost lost my on life I was in a coma for 10 days I could honestly she myself slipping away but I fought for my life I did not want my mother to have to bury me instead after I relearned all the basic things in life talking, walking and learning how to feed myself again I wined up losing my mom which puts me in a very hard place I love her so much and I need her I feel she was to young to die. When she was in the hospital I had a feeling something wasn't right because things she said to me I just wish she would of fought harder

I sent you an email because I had a lot to write. tc and GOD be with you every day of your life helping you.

My mom and I used to talk all the time as she was getting older and one day out of the clear sky my mom said to me if anything ever happens to me Your going to be okay, You'll get through it. They seem to want to prepare us for that day. The thing is I can't seem to really get through it, I feel so alone and lonely; and I'm not okay cause every day that goes by I feel so alone, unhappy and lonely without her. I've changed, I feel like I'm not that same person I was, My mom was my whole life. I do know, some day, we'll be together. It's not the end. I'm catholic and have had spiritual experiences so please, believe me, when I say its' not the end. we will be with them again FOREVER. May GOD be with you thru your pain, sorrow and loneliness. tc

my mom pass june 9, 2011, and I DO KNOW how your feeling.My mom used to say to me if anything ever happens to her that I will be able to cope and that I'll get through it. WELL "I'm not able to cope and I feel like I'm not getting through it. I just miss her so much. she was my mom/best friend and i'm married with married children and g/children grown up now and, yet, i feel SO ALONE with everyone around me. it's like i'm in my own world, I changed, I'll never be the same again. When my mom mom, I feel I died. I don't like anyone saying to me you need to MOVE ON - I hate that sying because the only thing I can do is MOVE THROUGH IT THE BEST I KNOW HOW. I think to me MOVE ON means i'm leaving go of her and I can't do that. Between the both sayings, I'm happier MOVING THROUGH THIS rather than MOVING ON. hope you understand what I mean. We will ALWAYS miss our moms but, some day, when its our turn we will be with them forever never to separate again. GOD didn't make us to dispose of us, GOD has a plan. we're just all inpatient and can't see it. take care and GOD BLESS YOU EVERY DAY OF YOUR LIFE.