Hey, 

So in my fridge is the glonal packs waiting for this evening. I'm nervous and excited and tons of feelings.  It's hard though b/c my best friend really doesn't know what to say. i almost don't want to talk to her about it b/c she doesn't say the right things. I don't know what the "right things" are, but more than "it'll all go well" or, "lol" when i say something... i know she doesn't know what to say. But she did offer if i want to talk, which is important.  

My husband is as suppportive as possible, but i want to be strong for him - not make this the biggest deal of our lives, you know? I know he's stressed about it, but he's also stressed about other things, like work. i don't want to add to his pile with "OMG we're trying IVF! We've become one of those couples thats had to resort to this. " And the "what if's" - "what if it doesn't work? Whats the next step? how do i handle it if it doesn't work? what if it does work?? In a way i don't know if i beleive it can work. So many people it hasn't worked for.. but reading a lot of the recent posts, i'm seeing that it does work. But i thinki'm to scared to believe that it could work for ME. For us. After all of this, am i going to look back and be like well that was a waste?" I dont know.. I don't even know if i'm making sense here.. I guess i feel like it can totally work for others, but probably not for me. I want to be positive and be like watch it work. But it's too hard for me.  Maybe you guys out there in this group can think positive for me?  I will continue to do my part and I personally strongly believe in G-d, so i will continue to Pray... but maybe if you guys can some of the faith and the positivity for me ... i would really appreciate it.  

Thanks and thinking of you all!

xoxoxo