I have problem with trust and forgiveness with my husband. I have no problems forgiving him because I'm a forgiving person to people who I think are genuinely sorry. I truly believe he is genuinely sorry but he doesn't seem to want to fix the problem so it doesn't happen again. This is where my trust issues has become a problem. I don't believe him anymore. We have lots fights, lots of hurt, lots grudges that I hold on to as well. I want to move forward with him but I ask myself at what cost? The cost of my self-respect, self worth, example to my child...which I don't seem to have any left and feel now I have become the mother I didn't want to be (fighting in front of her, she is 11 months old). We fight about his need to have a close relationship to his mother, father and sister. I'm married to him and his family. His family has done a lot of hurtful things towards me that I have a hard time forgiving them because it continues to happen. The family is very dominating in our lives and his ex girlfriend from over 13 years ago is still apart of the family because of her child. The child is not my husband but he helped raise her as his own until his ex-girlfriend didn't want him to be her father anymore. I therefore have been forced to include this child in my life and deal with hearing about his ex-girlfriend. We also fight about his lies, his lack of communication and his lack of caring about me and our daughters well being. I have now started to have a temper because I cant held to talk to him husband for hours to only realize that he doesnt get it and we have wasted our day/night or hours. Its like talking to a wall. I have been married for almost 3 years to him (first marriage) and have dated him for 5 years before we have one child together who is 11 months. When we are not talking about his family, or going to see them when we just have time away from them we are good, happy and we can see each other being together and working things out. The communication is not the best with him but we are working on that. But he cant stay away from his family too long and then the problems start happing again. I do want to work things out but Im not sure if it can be done? I want more kids with him as I dont want my child to be an only child. I want to be able to stay home with my child and my future children. I just feel if I leave no more kids with us, no more me raising my child as she will need to go into daycare. I'm torn as what is the right thing to do? Why dont I have the guts to do it? Why did I let him as his family take advantage of me? How did I lose my self worth? Why cant I just leave, why do I want to work it out, knowing my child is seeing us "trying to work it out"? Does anyone out there understand what I'm going through? Does anyone want to be an ear and can take on so much pain I feel? Does anyone want to help me? Can someone please care to help me, I'm a person who always wanted to help, always care about people and animals, always feels for other peoples pain, never been judgmental but now I feel that this world has chew me up, spit me out and has left me heartbroken and weak. What a sad story.