Lying Community Group
For those who have very deep problems that associate them to lie to those that they love and know. If this is one of you, please join.
I am someone who had built a lot of lies when I was younger and wove them into the narrative of my life. It became easier to lie about my life than tell the truth. I have lost good people due to being a man that couldn't be trusted. It's damaged my relationship with my father and Brother. For the past 8 years I have been working on being different, but occasionally I will slip with regards to past lies that I am maintained for years, or I might tell a white lie/embellishment once in awhile. I am probably going to lose my marriage to this, but I still want to stop doing this.
I am feeling overwhelmed because when things go badly with my wife she looks at things and tears them apart looking for inconsistencies and lies. I feel that not only will I be unable to stop but I will never be able to earn a right to be trustworthy person to her. She deserves that so much, and even though we have been through a lot... I'm afraid that I am bad for her because of it.
How are things now after a month? I know what you mean about when a spouse breaks down stories looking for inconsistencies. I don't think. Many things are more embarrassing or exhausting.
Wish you the best.
Thank you for sharing your story and being vulnerable. You're not alone. I'm trying to save my marriage right now, too. I've been married for 5 years. I'm 24 years old, and I've been a compulsive liar. I know how it feels to be scrutinized both when I should be and when I'm actually telling the truth. I know how frustrating that can be. I'm glad that either way, you want to change your life. Know that you are not a victim and that you CAN change. If you're like me, my wife is very smart and logical, she always needs to know details to make sure things add up. I want to give that to her, but I've always been so lazy in my communication and I've definitely gotten worse as I took her for granted. I'm glad that you realize that she deserves the truth. Something good to say is, "I'd rather lose you than lie to you." If you truly believe she is valuable.
The honest truth, C.D., is that you are bad for her (if you continue to lie). You can only be good for her if you STOP lying and START telling the truth. I take the same advice for myself. I'm going to be praying for you and your situation.
May you find strength in Christ.
Thank you for sharing your story and being vulnerable. You're not alone. I'm trying to save my marriage right now, too. I've been married for 5 years. I'm 24 years old, and I've been a compulsive liar. I know how it feels to be scrutinized both when I should be and when I'm actually telling the truth. I know how frustrating that can be. I'm glad that either way, you want to change your life. Know that you are not a victim and that you CAN change. If you're like me, my wife is very smart and logical, she always needs to know details to make sure things add up. I want to give that to her, but I've always been so lazy in my communication and I've definitely gotten worse as I took her for granted. I'm glad that you realize that she deserves the truth. Something good to say is, "I'd rather lose you than lie to you." If you truly believe she is valuable.
The honest truth, C.D., is that you are bad for her (if you continue to lie). You can only be good for her if you STOP lying and START telling the truth. I take the same advice for myself. I'm going to be praying for you and your situation.
May you find strength in Christ.
Thank you for sharing your story and being vulnerable. You're not alone. I'm trying to save my marriage right now, too. I've been married for 5 years. I'm 24 years old, and I've been a compulsive liar. I know how it feels to be scrutinized both when I should be and when I'm actually telling the truth. I know how frustrating that can be. I'm glad that either way, you want to change your life. Know that you are not a victim and that you CAN change. If you're like me, my wife is very smart and logical, she always needs to know details to make sure things add up. I want to give that to her, but I've always been so lazy in my communication and I've definitely gotten worse as I took her for granted. I'm glad that you realize that she deserves the truth. Something good to say is, "I'd rather lose you than lie to you." If you truly believe she is valuable.
The honest truth, C.D., is that you are bad for her (if you continue to lie). You can only be good for her if you STOP lying and START telling the truth. I take the same advice for myself. I'm going to be praying for you and your situation.
May you find strength in Christ.