Low Self Esteem Community Group
This group is for people who need support from other DS members to help boost their self-esteem.
Often, I find myself listing every single thing I hate about myself. I think I do it because once I was told to list everything I loved about myself to get my self-esteem up. Haha, it backfired.
I always find something to frown upon about myself. My legs are short, my thighs fat. My stomach jiggles, my boobs are too big. My arms are flabby, the left one scarred. My fingers are short, one fingernail messed up after I slammed it in a car door. My face is too long, my hair an awful shade of brown. My mouth is too small, my nose is too freckly. I'm too hairy, I'm too short, my hips are not womanly, etc., etc. The list goes on and on, gravitating from looks to smarts. I find something bad in everything I do.
I know, realistically, I'm a fine-looking person. I'm skinny, I don't have any deformities. Even my scars aren't as visible as I think they are. I know, realistically, that I'm fairly smart. I read, I write. I'm told my writing is good.
But I can't convince myself - even though I know it's true - that I'm a fine person. I'm so frustrated. I force myself to suffer because I don't feel like I deserve to be happy. I know that I'm lying to myself, but I just can't get it through my head. Ah, whatever. I'm just ranting.
I always find something to frown upon about myself. My legs are short, my thighs fat. My stomach jiggles, my boobs are too big. My arms are flabby, the left one scarred. My fingers are short, one fingernail messed up after I slammed it in a car door. My face is too long, my hair an awful shade of brown. My mouth is too small, my nose is too freckly. I'm too hairy, I'm too short, my hips are not womanly, etc., etc. The list goes on and on, gravitating from looks to smarts. I find something bad in everything I do.
I know, realistically, I'm a fine-looking person. I'm skinny, I don't have any deformities. Even my scars aren't as visible as I think they are. I know, realistically, that I'm fairly smart. I read, I write. I'm told my writing is good.
But I can't convince myself - even though I know it's true - that I'm a fine person. I'm so frustrated. I force myself to suffer because I don't feel like I deserve to be happy. I know that I'm lying to myself, but I just can't get it through my head. Ah, whatever. I'm just ranting.
I know it sounds corny or whatever, but every time your mind has a mind of its own - as in it tells you distorted things about yourself - get mad, and say that's not true, and tell yourself something positive. I've heard it called "changing the tapes". It's hard to do because so many of us say these stupid things to ourselves without even knowing it, so it's hard to catch. But if you do it, and stick to doing it, eventually you change the tapes, and what gets put on auto pilot is - I'm smart, I'm talented, I'm good, I'm fun etc. Eventually it gets programmed into your self conscious. The trick is sticking to it.
Hope that helps, and for what it's worth, when I clicked on this link and saw your picture there it was like a burst of sunshine! I thought, "She looks really nice!" and "Oh, she's so cute!" So just know that you radiate a certain joy and that it comes from within. You look like you're fun to be with : )