After being in a few abusive relationships I was stuck on the idea of I would proably be stuck in a life of being single and not have a loving relationship again, but then after a lot of time and a lots and lots of conversations and video call I found love with a old flame (we had grow apart due to distance) He treated me right and was so supportive with my mental health recovery...
He knew that I had been in abusive relationships and that I had a massive struggle to trust people I just was scared incase he would place his hand on me in a bad way, but all being all I now love and trust his touch...
I mean I'm a little funny still about him touching my neck and I still panic at anything covering my mouth (little stressful with the current mask wearing rule at the moment with Covid-19)
He proved me wrong and showed me that even after all the horrid relationships he shown me that not all men are like that at all there is no way on earth that I would of trusted a relationship again even with my male friends I thought they were only friends with me because there was something in it for them...
The torment of being hit, spat at, pinned to a wall by my throat aswell as mental abuse was enough for a life time...
I just took my time and attentively opened myheart again and found the prefect matches do exsit...
We had our first daughter together on the 3rd April 2020 (first week of UK lockdown)
and as long as plans go ahead fine next year (and Covid buggers off) we are hoping to get married next August
I'mnot making this post to rub it in at all but to show people that with a little time and getting to truly know a person that things ca get better for us all...
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check out that smoke ring. It tasted really good. I smothered it with Maulls BBQ sauce which is Local to St. Louis and one of the best I ever had.....
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I was recently separated from my wife of 33 years and it's complicated. Anyway I rented a room about 15 minutes away and I see my kids about once a week. I see the people who own the house I live in once in a while but other than that I stay in my room where I do my cooking, wash dishes in the shower, read, color, and sleep. I get out at least once a day. I grocery shop and I attend 2 meetings...
You deserve alot of credit and I hope you continue to work on your life to get it back to normal or as much as normal as possible. There may be some struggles ahead but with a supportive mate, taking the lead, your trust in others will gradually increase over time and your fear will dissipate.
Good luck going forward. I hope everything works out for you.
God Bless
It's really hard to escape and I tried numerous times to take my own life due to the distress it caused me...
It was a truly hard time but I'm getting there day by day...