Liars Anonymous Community Group

A support group to provide those with a compulsive addiction to lie a place to share hope, strength and courage with others like them; solve our common problem and help others with a compulsion to lie. We aren't alone!

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Losing myself

sacredankh
sacredankh

I have an addiction with lying. I was in a mental abusive relationship for so long that I lied about anything to keep the peace in the house. I finally found the most loving woman that is honest to a fault is that I lie to her over the dumbest things or I tell a story and I make it better then it should be or I say I never said that and try to find a way out of it.. I dont know how much more she's going to be with me but I cannot lose her. She’s been the most dedicated woman and amazing to me. I started reading that, First pick a date to stop lying well that date is today. 



I am 32 and a lot of my life I have felt and really been alone. The concept of lying was and is easy for me than telling the truth. I am so scared that I tell lies and stick with them until someones uncovers the truth. I honestly don't know what to do or where to go at this point. I have lost sight of who I really am. Am I the failure I think I am? Am I the burden that I have always penned myself as? Could I be the good person I wish I was? 



When I feel depressed I lose myself and try to find something that makes me feel like a “winner”... something that makes me feel like I’m good at anything, whether it be cards, video games, cleaning, just anything. Just to feel real, to feel like I’m alive, to feel like I could be normal. 



I lie all the time so I won’t have to face the truth. I lie to cover up my wrongdoing or lie to protect my loved one but it only makes it worse for me, because I always get caught in the lie and now my family doesn’t trust me or believe a word I say because I lie so much. My lying is causing my family so much hurt. I realize I’m a very selfish person because all I think about is my feelings and not the feelings of my loved ones.



I don't want to loose the love of my life the only person that I feel really cares for me. I want to break this habit. During our relationship I've known that she would be mad, frustrated, or just upset if I tell the truth but I always choose to lie like I did going up to stay out of trouble.


gwilly
gwilly
I am truly sorry to hear you are in this position. The feelings you described her things that I and many of us here have gone through also. It sounds like you've done some good self-analysis and figured out who you are and what you're doing that's hurting those around you and yourself. Now figure out who that could person is that you want to be and figure out what you have to do to become that person. Make a plan things to do on a daily basis. Stick to that plan everyday. And don't be afraid to tell your significant other what you're doing to fix the problems in your life. I think that will help her find Hope and security and help your relationships to be better.
gwilly
gwilly
1 more thought That has always worked well for me is the quote from the movie a guy named Joe. The older gentleman tells Joe to reveal everything there is to reveal about himself and let the chips fall where they may. This is a good way of clearing out all the issues and lies and junk that you have inside, and then moving on from there. Good luck.