Hey All, this is my first time ever on anything like this. I'm 33, and finally realized how bad my lying is. I guess you can call me a compulsive habitual liar. And its affecting everything around me now. My entire everyday life. My relationship. My work. My family. Its gotten to the point where I started to believe my lies and cloud my own vision and others around me. When I'm telling a lie, my head is saying the truth. But it never comes out. And when I'm confronted about my lies, it does the same thing. I continue to keep up with them because its gone on so long. But I don't want to be this person that I've become. I want to be better. And I guess the reason for finally taking this step is because I never wanted to be better for anyone. But I met this amazing woman who accepts me and loves me for who I am. And I lied to her and its breaking me apart. I came clean with my lies, but only after she knew and confronted me about them. Now, dispite our love for one another, our relationship is on the precipice. And I think I'm going to lose her. She looks at me and she doesn't know who shes living with. Shes questioning everything, even the truth. And I don't blame her. I'm constantly trying to make it up to her but I feel like I'm not good enough to have her in my life. That she deserves better and I don't. But I want to fix this broken body and mind that I'm in. I just don't know how. This is my cry for help. This is my cry for change. I just don't know what to do... I want to be better. For her. But mostly for myself.