Infertility, Secondary Support Group
"Secondary infertility" is difficulty conceiving after already having conceived and carried a normal pregnancy. Apart from various medical conditions (e.g. hormonal), this may come as a result of age and stress felt to provide a sibling for their first child.
Hi
Im new here and I'm not realy sure where to begin!!!
I'm feeling frustrated right now which is what motivated my search for a discussion group.
My DH and I have been TTC #2 for 7 1/2 years.
I'm trying not to give up hope that this will happen. But as time goes on it's harder and harder to remain positive. Especially now that people are starting to make comments like "so when are you having your next one..." and so on.
Our Immediate family knows about our struggles, but the extended family does not.
I'm tired of laughing off all the comments that people feel are OK to make.
I'm tired of all the advise on how to get pregnant.
I'm tired of hoping and praying and visualizing every month and then being so crushed when my period shows up.
I'm tired of answering the phone to hear "guess who's pregnant...."
I sound really bitter and honestly I'm not I just neded to get this out.
We have 4 friends with "infertility" all 4 of them have had their treatmants work within 2 years. 2 of them have actually gone on to have another child.
well thats my rant, thank you for letting me get this off of my chest.
Im new here and I'm not realy sure where to begin!!!
I'm feeling frustrated right now which is what motivated my search for a discussion group.
My DH and I have been TTC #2 for 7 1/2 years.
I'm trying not to give up hope that this will happen. But as time goes on it's harder and harder to remain positive. Especially now that people are starting to make comments like "so when are you having your next one..." and so on.
Our Immediate family knows about our struggles, but the extended family does not.
I'm tired of laughing off all the comments that people feel are OK to make.
I'm tired of all the advise on how to get pregnant.
I'm tired of hoping and praying and visualizing every month and then being so crushed when my period shows up.
I'm tired of answering the phone to hear "guess who's pregnant...."
I sound really bitter and honestly I'm not I just neded to get this out.
We have 4 friends with "infertility" all 4 of them have had their treatmants work within 2 years. 2 of them have actually gone on to have another child.
well thats my rant, thank you for letting me get this off of my chest.
I am so sorry you are going through this. SIF is an awful thing for anyone to have. I wish there was a sure thing to get any of us pregnant.
Lots of baby dust to you, and know if you ever need to get things off your chest, we are here and are going through the same things.
I agree with you, it is absolutely exhausting to hear all the comments. I think it's worse when people know you already have one child, 99% of the population doesn't seem to realize you might just not be able to get pregnant with a snap of the fingers the second time around. I can't believe the insensitivity of some people, and I resorted in the past year to saying things like "whether or not we have another baby is not actually up to US" or "for some people, it is not so easy to have lots of babies". People do look a little embarrassed when I say things like that, but I think it serves them right for being so rude.
Best of luck to you, I hope this is your month. :)
(Are you doing any treatments right now?)
Hugs.
Then, I always had in my mind that IVF would be the sure thing since I had one successful preg. before. It's like I still can't believe how much continued failure I've had while all my friends and family - even those with IF - have moved on.
Anyway, it's tough and I wish it would get easier. I think if this IVF#2 fails for me and we are totally done, then maybe I can begin to heal, but right now while in the midst of it, it's still so painful.
I too get tired of the commens of "when are you going to have another one." My MIL even went and ahead and bought baby stuff AFTER I told her what a hard time we are having.
I lose hope too. Its very hard especially when everyone around goes on to have baby #2 and #3.
~Sara
I don't want to become bitter, and that is why I am joining the online group. None of my friends are in the same situation as me, and I desperately need to be able to relate to someone. Thank you for posting your feelings. Best wishes!!