Infertility, Secondary Support Group
"Secondary infertility" is difficulty conceiving after already having conceived and carried a normal pregnancy. Apart from various medical conditions (e.g. hormonal), this may come as a result of age and stress felt to provide a sibling for their first child.
Hello! After TTC for 5.5 years, two miscarriages, a dozen medicated IUIs, three IVF transfers and zero luck, we were blessed with a son through gestational surrogacy with my best friend.
I am so grateful for my sweet boy, but I am simultaneously struggling with trying to figure out how to have another child so that my son can have a sibling. My best friend ended up having pregnancy complications and my son spent four months in the NICU, so we are not able to do surrogacy with her again. We remain best friends through it all.
My husband and I have embryos at our RE's office, but we are afraid that if we put them into my body, they will not implant like the other six embryos that have failed during IVF.
I thought that having a child would satiate my suffering and desire, but having a baby is better than I ever could have dreamed of. So, now my desire for another child is just as strong, or stronger, than it's always been.
Am I selfish to want another baby after receiving such a miracle? Do I try to find another friend to carry a baby for us (hello -- that's a huge deal and massive expense!) Do I try IVF with my body again? Do we adopt? Do we accept that we will have an only child and my son will never have the joys of a sibling?
Please share how you come to terms with all of these confusing emotions!
I am so grateful for my sweet boy, but I am simultaneously struggling with trying to figure out how to have another child so that my son can have a sibling. My best friend ended up having pregnancy complications and my son spent four months in the NICU, so we are not able to do surrogacy with her again. We remain best friends through it all.
My husband and I have embryos at our RE's office, but we are afraid that if we put them into my body, they will not implant like the other six embryos that have failed during IVF.
I thought that having a child would satiate my suffering and desire, but having a baby is better than I ever could have dreamed of. So, now my desire for another child is just as strong, or stronger, than it's always been.
Am I selfish to want another baby after receiving such a miracle? Do I try to find another friend to carry a baby for us (hello -- that's a huge deal and massive expense!) Do I try IVF with my body again? Do we adopt? Do we accept that we will have an only child and my son will never have the joys of a sibling?
Please share how you come to terms with all of these confusing emotions!
I can't really help you with all of your questions, but I would encourage you to follow your heart in trying to have another child. If there is a way to do it, and you can make it happen, then maybe you should try! Children are so amazing and having siblings is pretty amazing too. Good luck with your journey and I hope you have success, whichever way you decide to go!
I have an almost 11 month old daughter via DE and she is the best thing that ever happened to me but I long for another baby, a sibling for my daughter. I want her to have a best friend to grow up with. I am currently in the middle of a FET cycle and at day 8 of my 2WW, it is torture!
I wish you the best of luck in having another child! Keep us posted. xoxo.
Our journey continues to provide opportunities for strength and growth. In November, I had an absolutely unexpected, miracle beyond all miracles pregnancy, completely naturally. What??? I just knew this was it. All of our dreams come true.
There was no heartbeat at our first ultrasound and we suffered through yet another miscarriage. My husband and I were heartbroken.
Now, we are praying that we can do gestational surrogacy again.
Love and hugs to you all!
Good luck with whatever you decide and wanting another baby is never selfish.