Yeah, there's a substantial meaning being tired of it. It's been 7 years for me and I still grieve the loss of my husband for 40 years. The grief isn't like it was the first year or the following years, but it's present. I'm remarried almost 3 years now and am very happy with my life. But that doesn't change my love for Don. His birthday is coming soon and I constantly think about it. I'm not crying and crushed like I was, but it never leaves my brain as I wait for the day to arrive.

I accept the memories now, almost as part of my life and who I am. I learned this through the years after I lost him. I am the girl who met him in high school and married him afew years later. But im also the nurse, the mother, and the widow. Now I can add wife again. I'm all those things. And they all play a part in my life. It takes time to figure out how to deal and grow into this.

When Don died I realized life was like a quilt made up by each experience and now I know my life's quilt is still being added to. I thought my quilt was done when he died, but it and I continue to be more. Sharon

Wow Sharon, I love that analogy! Our life really is like a quilt. Everything we experience makes up a piece of it. Some of the patchwork is not as pretty as the rest but when it's all put together, you see the entire quilt and it's beautiful. What a great way too look at life........I will do it from now on!
......and Mel thanks for posting ...... If it weren't for you, Sharon may not have shared those words.
And yes, I get tired of it too. My husband passed the month after yours and sometimes I feel the same way you do (and mine died suddenly). Grieving is exhausting........
Hang in there,
Pam

love your analogy!! thanks for sharing. As a quilter, I have found that unless you add some darker fabric the colors don't "pop" as much. And we do only see the underside-the broken threads the various patches put together. Sometimes looking haphazard but when we get to heaven and see the whole thing we will be amazed.
And yes I am tired of greiving too, it will be a year next month for me. The rawness is gone now, and I have begun to laugh again. Feels good

At 5 years I feel I have had all the grieving one should have. But I do still grieve in a different way. The memories don't fade and I carry them with me. Tears do still come but they don't stay. I know I will see him again and that has kept me going for these 5 years. For me I think I will always miss the life I loved.but I go on. I know he would never want me to hurt over him forever. I feel I will always grieve him but in a different way with a lot less pain and great memories.

It has been almost three years since my husband died of cancer. I met someone wonderful but, there are moments that trigger grief. Grief is life a permanent scar you are left with, the initial wound needs healing so you take care of it but there is a permanent scar that will need nurturing sometimes. It will not go away as it cannot be permanently fixed but, it is now part of who I am and I embrace and befriend the new me.

Sharon that reminded me of a poem,

“Quilt of My Life”
by Annie Estlund
from the book ~ For Widows Only

It took 55 years
to design, piece and stitch
the quilt of my life into
an intricate
“Wedding Ring” design.
Then one morning,
in only seconds,
the quilt fell apart in my hands,
leaving only frayed
bits of fabric and
broken threads.
I now toil 'round the clock
to fashion a new quilt.
Working pieces both
old and new into a
“Lone Star” design.
It won't look the same
its strength is untested,
but it comforts me as
I carry on with the
second half of my life

Thank you for posting that poem, JoAnn.

Beautiful poem!!!

You guys have no idea what these posts have done for me this morning. I have driven alone over 1500 miles in two days to present my quilt pattern line at the biggest show of the year. I am filled with doubt and angst. This is how I have made a living since my husband died, something he always wanted me to do. Now, thismorning , are all these hopeful words about life, grief, renewal and quilts. Thank you all, Lori

That's awesome!

For me the day I was tired of grieving was the day I decided to embrace life once again and all the experiences that were possible within it. I opened myself to joy, peace and fun. It took me a long time to realize grief and joy can be blended into one life. We never forget, we carry them close to our hearts but we continue to live with a new sense of renewal. We must shed many tears and travel a very painful road but a modified and exciting life is waiting if you open your heart and mind to it.

Wonder of wonder, miracles of miracles, I'm actually living the second half of my life. I gave Morey and his beautiful children the first half......now, this half is for me! ♥