I've been through the same experience. My husband died 3.5 years ago. I started dating last year, had a boyfriend for 6 months and it didn't work out. I'm dating someone else right now but, I'm not sure where it will end. Like you, I would like to have someone to share my life with but, I want to be truly happy. I need to find that happiness within myself. Someone said that not everyone's destiny is to be married so it shouldn't be something that you should pursue, it's something that will just happen. I think it will happen naturally without any expectations. Also, I heard that I have already found my soul mate so the next person I meet will be someone totally different, it will be a different type of relationship. I'm not sure if there will be the one person for me until eternity, maybe, I'll meet many different types of people in my life that will bring happiness and joy.
Antonella

I've been on a dating site for 10 months now...and met some really nice men. Most are not a good fit, however. And often NOT what I expected them to be...for those stories, look at the book I am planning to write!

I was in one short term relationship, but there were so many obstacles that we both knew from day one it would never work out. BUT, it was so good for me to regain my confidence, and to know that there was a possibility of finding love again. I recently got out of a relationship (with a widower who DID get it) that was very intense and what I thought could be long term. However, it too became complicated, and we had to put an end to it. My heart is bruised, and I miss him terribly, but again, consider it a learning experience and confirmation that there are still good men to be found on dating websites.

My subscription is up in a couple of months, and I am taking time off. It IS time consuming, often disappointing, but sometimes rewarding. I know many people who have found their first or last love on them. And have a "happily ever after" story. I would say it is a good option, but certainly not your only option. Nothing like face to face contact right up front.

I think being scared about testing the waters is a natural feeling. The thought of kissing another man after more than 26 years was overwhelming, until it happened. Now I know that, although I don't believe anyone could love me the way that my husband did, there are men out there that can love me "enough" to form a long term, committed relationship. My life is full, and I'll be ok without one, but of course, for me (not everyone) I love being part of a couple, and miss it enough to pursue a new relationship.

Best of luck to you, as you venture forth. Not sure how old you are, but I would suggest Our Time (Senior People Meet) for men over 50. Seems like they are far more responsive and more serious about entering relationships.

Thank you so much for your insights!
I am 58 yrs old. Since I do not have any family close by I would love to have friend,partner,companion but I also know that I have many hobbies and there is always a project I am working on that I will be ok on my own if it will be the case! I was part of a couple for more then 32 yrs so it is hard!
I will check this website Our Time. Maybe I wil be lucky!
Thanks again! Love and hugs to you All!
Anna

I too want another man in my life, however, I have a problem with having to pay money to see who has viewed my profile, etc. And you can't pay for just one month....I think it is 6 months minimum. If you live on SS, you have to be careful where you spend your money. :-(

My relationship with my husband grew from a high school romance. It was strong and secure for our lives and we thought we had life worked out for retirement. That changed when he was diagnosed with lung cancer. Like Athankfulone, I met a school friend's brother who was also widowed and we socialized for almost a year. There was no romantic love, but having someone to do things with was great. It ended as we moving in different directions, but I will always cherish our conversations about love and loss.

After that relationship, I thought of using dating sites. I truly wasn't sure if I wanted a relationship, but I did miss my friend. I saw a picture of a guy who lived 8 miles away and I liked his profile. We eventually met for lunch and have fallen in love. Our relationship is very different from our marriages. But we met as different people who are ready to love again. Sharon

I've been on and off dating sites...truly they haven't worked out well for me, in terms of finding a longer term relationship.
One thing I can recommend is to check into meetup.com. This is like a Facebook for social groups - you can find groups of people who have similar interests to you, who get together for social outings. There are some very active ones in our city for dining out, walking together, crafts, artistic pursuits, even things like medieval re-enactments. I myself sponsored one specifically for widows and widowers. We have 40+ members now, and go bowling, for archery, to musicals, coffee dates, etc. it might be a good way of easing in, especially if your not ready to date, but would like to make new friends.

I have been thinking about starting meetup group for widows and widowers! Thank you for sharing!
I belong to support group and we have dinner together once a month. We became good friends and I think the group can be much bigger! Thanks again to all of you!