HOCD Support Community Group
A place to support one-another through HOCD.
Hello everyone, I'm a 21 year old male. So this is my story. I have always liked females and females have always turned me on. I have never had any feelings for men whatsoever. Recently I just started a new job two weeks and they paired me up with a male coworker who was showing me how to get the job done and so on and everything was normal. That night when I fell asleep I had a dream where he was flirting with me and I woke up scared cause I know I'm straight. I went into work trying my best to avoid him cause I felt really uncomfortable working with him and I know it sounds really weird but that day after work I went home and decided to watch that new documentary on Aaron Hernandez and so i was watching it and i saw the part where they mentioned that he was actually gay but wouldn't come out cause he hated being gay and just had a girlfriend to cover up. After I heard that I asked myself "what if I'm gay too cause I had that dream and it really terrified me cause deep down I know I'm straight but it got me because of the "gay dream" I had. After that I haven't been able to get that question out of my head and I keep asking myself if I'm gay because of the dream but deep down I know I'm straight and never had any type of feelings or arousel by any men. I have a girlfriend who I've been dating for 5 months and before that dream we were really good, my feelings for her were really strong and I enjoyed every part of sex with her and after that dream I keep obsessing about that question "am I gay" and it just won't let me get turned on by her cause I keep thinking about it. It's really affecting my life cause that question keeps popping up in my head but deep down I know I'm straight and I love females and don't get turned on my guys at all. I have always wanted to settle down with a female and have kids and live a happy life but with this I feel like my feelings are going away and I feel really stressed and depressed because I know I'm not gay. I have nothing against gay people I just know I'm not gay but the question keeps popping up. At work I feel like people think I'm soft now and I hate going now. I appreciate any type of help please. Thank you