Help in Deciding to Leave or Stay Community Group
This group aims to gently help people decide about leaving or staying in their abusive relationship. This support covers whatever is needed to help the person be ready and able to go or stay; to actually make that decision and be confident it is the right one. The decision is a personal one and nobody can tell anyone what to do. We can only be with another person and help...
My husbands behavior is driving me crazy. I really think I am going to slip a gear one day! I find myself dreading when he comes home (usually late and drunk). He is so moody and sensitive. He treats me like crap and wonders why I am mad at him. I think he knows what he is doing. He thinks everything is about him. He says things that make me feel guilty (as a means of controlling me). He gets all upset about something on the news and starts raising his voice, and saying bad words. He scares the dogs when he does this. He also gets on my nerves. Tonight he started that raising his voice thing, it made me feel so on edge I felt like my insides were quivering. My stomach also got upset. A lot of times when I have had a hard time with him I would come here thinking I would write and express myself, but most of the time I am to exhausted to put things into words. I just feel drained and depressed. I read some of the other members topics and find I have so much in common with other members. Thank you everyone for your posts. They do help.
MDP
MDP
He sounds as if he has big problems. So maybe you need to work out how to help yourself deal with this somehow. You could leave or you could find ways to get a great life going for yourself. What do you think?
What can we do to help you?
If you suspect he knows what he's doing the chances are he does. If he knows he is doing it and still continues to do so, is there really anything that will change it?
Only you will know when you just cant take anymore...
Tasty.xxx.
He reminds me of my husband. Mine knows what he is doing though he will deny it. I have found that out in many ways. My h is sadistic and a narcissist and yours sounds to me to be like that too.
And my h hurts and annoys me in so many ways. And he is always inventing new ways. I think it is a fun sport to him, like a cat with a mouse. You know, a mouse being tormented by a cat is very, very stressed. And this stress affects us badly. You can't get the cat to stop - no way! You have to remove yourself somehow. It is darn hard.
I agree that it is good to share how it is for us. That is important. If we are to turn things around at least somewhat, it will help to ferret out things to help make things better. But we also need to speak about the awful things that happen and to be heard and just accepted.
I am reminded of what experts say are good ways to respond to children and teens when they share their issues with us. And I am reminded of how I feel when I want to share a painful experience. Our experiences are important. They are what our lives are made up of. And our feelings...yes, indeed...can't they be just awful!
I have a very self-centered, critical and ungiving husband. I was thinking just yesterday how my house could look better - shudder. And I then thought how the situation I am in makes a difference. And he could help in many ways. Who put him as the cold judge in his throne, and said he wasn't to help with things?
I think I would simply lose the ability to cope if I depended on him for all my good times and the sense that I am doing ok. Not that it is easy anyway.