been there done that got the t shirt,, many people are not able to commit that is who you are,,, just keep the communication honest and open,,,,if you are incompatable be honest and move on for both your sakes ,, sounds like are already there,,, I just went through a break up it is not easy , I am sure you care deeply but maybe just not a good match , best to you as you figure it out,, life is full of these sticky choices bmw

I just want her to fricken hate me and walk away...I don't understand why she doesn't.
I keep telling her I will break her heart (apparently, though I don't remember sending a lot of emails saying that)
I think she'll destroy us, because we love her, and that's what all the people who love me do, so why can't she just do it while I can still survive her smashing me to bits?

I HATE MYSELF! why doesn't she hate me too?

Assuming control. The Front needs respite.
-Katharine

OMG so been there recently , NObody got the us part til now ,, but totally a heart break closet she has it too but I know my track record too damn old for any heartache

She still wants to work it out?!?!?! WTF?

Doesn't she know we're DIRTY?

(We are REALLY not doing well tonight -Katherine)

sometimes people refuse to see the reality of a situation and thus is a form of denial. As far as monogamy, I know many people who are polyamorous. There are some people out there who just need people who are good friends and occasionally you sleep together. Lets be serious, sex is entertainment :P religions attach shame to it as a means of control and then try to say it is some glamorous thing that should be locked in a small little box and rarely shared. I hate to say it, but that is a completely foolish assumption. With the exception of a very small number of animals on this earth who mate for life (usually for evolutionary reasons) most creatures are not designed for that. So in my mind there is nothing wrong with the not being able to commit to one person. As for her not seeing it, it will take some time to get through the denial phase, once she does, then she will go unless she has issues that make her think she will never find someone better.

Somewhat less flipping out today.

GF took it as "I'm just Ms Right Now." And that's not at all it.
It's partially a trust thing. My ex was an asexual in denial...and she STILL expected fidelity, even in The Year Of No Sex. I was miserable.
Committing to be monogamous feels like a trap now.
Second, I never stopped lusting after others, and I hid myself away to avoid temptation...and became very depressed.

So while GF makes me very happy, I am afraid to commit to monogamy. So far, it wasn't good for me.
We're still feeling our one little guy's terror at Dad's nightly horrorshow...