Family Scapegoats Community Group
This is a Group for discussing Scapegoating. The Scapegoat is often the family member who tells or acts out the truth ("the Truth Teller") regarding the family's dysfunction that no one else is prepared to acknowledge or talk about. It is this truth telling that makes them the target for carrying the blame for all the family's problems. If you are the Scapegoat...
Hello all. This is a very quiet group....
I stopped contact with most of my family of origin 2 years ago and did not attend any family events, which are frequent since we all live in relative close proximity to one another.
In Canada we had Thanksgiving this past Sunday, and I decided to give it one last shot at achieving some sort of normal relationship. So, I invited the family. Surprisingly about half the family attended (it’s a very large family) and I would say we all had a nice, pleasant time together. I will continue keeping my distance since I have used the time away to develope other relationships and traditions, but will now likely attend one event per year. I am not naive enough to think we will suddenly be best friends, but my life feels more balanced now.
And, yes, I was freetobeme.... :-).
I am not in a position to do the same and I don't think it would be advisable anyway at this point. I am wondering about underlying issues and if they made an appearance during your family gathering. I know if I were to get together with my family nothing would be said about the underlying issues and I would not be inclined to bring it up either.
Nobody talked about issues. We mostly discussed who’s doing what, that sort of thing. There was no tension but without going into too much detail, the same dynamics were present.... it just played out differently. Who knows... maybe I’ve changed.