hello hun i'm just another person and definately not a proffessional and i appologise 4 my spelling mistakes here but no you r not a bad person my wife is suffering with this illness as well and trust me I know how it turns the person with the illness to change weather it in or for a short or long time from 1 way or dispisition to another it make it very hard on thoose of us dealling with the person suffering to continue to love them as we all-ways have as they deal or act-out thier anger over the loss of control over thier memory & thier lifes that the person suffering has, thats why I am so glad to have just found ds b/c I now see we r suffering as well.gl 2 you. feel free 2 look me up & IM me if u feel i have or can b of any help. GOD BLESS YOU TC, n HAG1 or try to,lol.

for some families its just too much for them . I cant imagine having to go through all you and your family are going through thinking of it as my mom or grandma its very distressing because you for all the years have come to love and trust them and all that is out the door in this stage .. my mother made me promise her when i was very young to never ever no matter how mean she got lol if she gets this disease to put her in any kind of facility or home, and i agreed and iam a woman of my word.. growing up she worked as a cna in nursing homes and she saw how lots of them were treated and couldnt bear to just stand by and so she stood up against abuse that she saw go on and was let go for it .. im saying all this because there are some of us that do work in these facilities that have the passion and the heart we arent just there for the paycheck .. some families can handle it but some cant dont let it tear you so down that your getting depressed or it starts effecting your own well being dont be ashamed of feeling the way you do either because i have heard the same things from a lot of other families .. just know your not alone like he or she said above .. its all about reaching out or asking for help sometimes just having someone let you let it all out can help too .. will be praying for you and your family hang in there

It does no good to argue with an Alzheimer's patient. There is no reasoning with them, they become unable, not by trying to get along with other's but sincerely UNABLE to wrap their brain around "reason or reality". It's part of the process of the disease unfortunately. It is so hard to try to care for these people and can not only be frustrating but heartbreaking, watching them deteriorate over time. You try so hard to keep them healthy and well, meanwhile they just keep slipping further and further into this horrible disease. I went through it with my dad for 7 years. The last 2, he had to be in a rest home because he had to go on a feeding tube and I could no longer take care of him at home. The main thing is to try not to feel like you're choosing sides, it's not about that. I know this is an adult but you have to realize their mind becomes more and more, that of a child. They need to feel that they can trust you because they depend on you to have their best interest at heart. It's perfectly normal to get frustrated and angry, that's why it's best to talk to people who know, first hand what you're going through. You need to vent but don't take it out on her or anything like that because she truly cannot help it and your parents need to reach out to others that can help them understand this disease more also and try to be patient and kind to her. The day will come when she will no longer be with you and you don't want to have regrets. If you feel that you are unable to continue, without "losing it", so to say, it is ok to find an alternative for her living arrangements. You have to do what's best for you and her. I know sometimes it's hard to keep your sanity in this situation.

I’m so relieved to see I’m not alone in this battle, but sorry to hear everyone else’s problems. I’ve been living with my mother for the last 16 years after she asked me to move home and help take care of my father, who was dying. After he passed, she asked me to stay and look after her. I did these things with no hesitation and because of deep love. Never mind I am the baby of the family with two older brothers who don’t live close.
Over the last 6-8 months I’ve noticed a dramatic and rapid decline in my mother’s cognitive skills. I tried enlisting family members but was met with rebuke. Tried talking to Mom delicately about going to the doctor. She refused. In the recent past she has been verbally assaultive and even had me put in jail. (I’m 51 and NEVER been in trouble in my life). Yet I returned out of a promise to her. Now she is worse. I can’t take much more and my family won’t talk to me. I live in a very small town with no help around.