Ok. So. A lot has happened in the past 2 months. First off my husband accused me of being with my foster brother because he and I went to take our kids to a battleship in Mobile, AL, coming from Destin, FL (about a 2 hour drive) Although he was with me when our son and I were invited, he never said anything to me until after we were already out there and we got into a small fight over it. He then proceeded to tell me that he and our sister in law (his older brothers wife) have more in common with each other than we do and that's why they talk on the phone and text all the time. They do work together in a way: she books fishing charters for her husbands company and my husband also owns a fishing charter company and they sometimes send each other trips (which is understandable and I'm fine with it). It's the sneaky deleting texts and speaking on the phone in another room when she calls that I don't agree with. It's shady and weird... Especially when he consoled her crying and left the room to talk to her and then deleted text messages between them on a daily basis..
(A little background on my foster brother: he moved in with my family when I was about 10, and moved out before he graduated high school, we've never been close and rarely talk, but he's divorced and his daughter was moving out of state with her mom and we wanted to take the kids to hang out before they wouldn't see each other again for a very long time) Also, that's really disgusting and hurt me quite badly that my husband would think I would ever do anything like that..)
My husbands older brother and his wife (the sister in law) have been married 2 years this month now and we were friends up until she started repeating to him everything private I would tell her about silly relationship crap.. So once their shady texting/phone calls started I then accused both of them as follows:"he loves you, he doesn't want me anymore" since that comment she has banned me from their home, I am no longer welcome there which upsets my husband because we do go over there from time to time to watch football and have dinner together. I mean, it sucks for me as well but I did say a hurtful thing.. I don't even know how to begin to apologize... Maybe write a letter, but I doubt she would even open or read it.. And his brother has a son from a previous marriage who is 2 years older than our son and they're buddies..

We also went to a pro football game that's I got kicked out of because the people behind us said I "spit" on them and it was their group of 5's word against mine.. I'm not even going to go there. Why would I do something like that when our team was winning in the first place? They had complained earlier about my husband standing up in front of them and yelling too loudly. Just unfortunate seating I guess. So he was extremely mad that I got kicked out and in our group was me, my husband, his younger brother and his girlfriend. I was going to wait in the car while they finished the game but they all left and he proceeded to scream at me the whole way back to the hotel. The words he said to me were horrible and I still hear them just about everyday in the back of my mind. He was so upset and angry and wouldn't stop. It was so bad, his little brother told him to back off. And I thought he was done with me, he even said if papers could have been served that very day he would have ended things then and there. I gave him my rings back because that last what I thought he wanted. (Forgot to mention, the game was in Jacksonville, FL and we were 6-7 hours from home and our son was at home with his grandmother). So we didn't speak the rest of the trip and the whole vacation was ruined.
When we got home I went to pick up our son and by then it was bedtime.. After our son went to sleep, he screamed at me and wouldn't allow me to speak or leave the room from 9pm to 1am. The next morning I called my dad and mom and told them what had happened and they both told me to get out of the house. I took our son to school, packed our stuff and hid in a safe house. He didn't come home to our house from 9am-midnight and then realized myself, the kid and puppy were gone. He went to my moms house looking for us... Kicked things around. Went to my moms boyfriends house and yelled at her and demanded to know where we were (which of course she wouldn't tell him). Then his dad and step mom called my mom and verbally attacked her over the phone.
I talked to my mom, dad, and a few old friends from work about my situation and they all recommended getting an order of protection. So that's what I did. The judge approved it immediately and removed all the guns from his possession.
After about 2 weeks of hiding out and waiting for the court date, we finally went to court to discuss all of this in front of a judge and he brought his own lawyer. I ended up asking them to keep the order of protection but drop the no contact portion and we are now back living together because our son, who is only 4, was begging to be back at home in his own bed.
We have been attending counseling together and separately and things have been pretty good. He's acting, for the most part, like we did when we were dating. We have a lot of communication issues to work on but are getting better.
But things aren't completely back to normal, and understandably. His family will have nothing to do with me. Won't speak to me, won't talk to me. We have invited both of his brothers over a few times to just watch football and eat dinner and there's always an excuse as to why they can't come. I could care less whether they like me or not, but it's not fair to my husband or my son to not get to see their family because of me and the problems I have created.

We have talked about not spending the holidays with our families this year and taking a break from it all. But I feel like as each holiday gets closer, the harder it gets for my husband. It puts a lot of strain on us and our relationship. At this point he is not even allowed to go to my sons school because of the restraining order and is going to miss out on school functions, that causes small arguments between us. I feel terrible and sent in a request to drop the order completely. I'm trying everything I can to try and fix this but I have no one to talk to about it and it's discouraging to be the one who screwed everything up.

I plan on brining up all of this at my next therapy session but today we just got a million and one excuses as to why people can't make it to our house to watch football and have dinner. When a few of them said they would come and then backed out last minute.

I need advice on what to do and how to go about fixing things.. I don't want them to miss out on family functions because no one is comfortable being around me. I do understand that it is ultimately my fault.. How do I sincerely apologize to these people and how can I help to make things right? I'm at a loss..

I love my husband very very much. My heart felt like it was physically breaking through all of this. We both love each other dearly and lust deeply for one another. Things are great when it's just our little family but with the holidays approaching so quickly I don't know what to do.

I have told him I'm ready to see his family and try and work out our issues there but I don't think they are ready yet, which is fine. I'm honestl not ready for it, but am trying to do what I believe is the right thing and trying to make amends. He has already told me he is not ready to see my family and they are giving him the time and space he needs to be ready for that again.

I thought I was one to hold a grudge and not forget. Maybe they just aren't forgiving people. It's scary and probably the hardest thing I've ever been through in my life. The problem is we are married, together forever and I'm not going anywhere. I hope they don't convince him to leave me eventually for real. It's scary. I'm not really sure what else to say...

Thank you for your time and patience.