As I waited at the pharmacy to have my prescription filled, my mind was racing. Did I want to lower my libido? What would that be like? What would the prostate device feel like? Would my wife agree to counselling? If I went alone, would there be any benefit?
I decided I would start by taking the medication, then order a device. Then maybe I'd sound my wife out about counseling.
I had taken the whole afternoon off for the doctor's appointment and thus arrived home a little early with my prescription. I'd use the time to research the prostate device online before my wife got home. But that changed as I pulled into the driveway and saw my wife's car there. I decided to enter quietly - maybe she was sleeping. Perhaps she was feeling under the weather. It was only a few months since she went back to work after maternity leave. Perhaps our baby was home, perhaps she was at daycare.
Entering quietly and proceeding down the hall to where our bedroom was, I could hear moaning. Not the moaning of agony. The moaning of pleasure. I had a scary thought - was my wife cheating on me? I froze, listening. She seemed to be quietly talking - to someone. As I listened, it certainly sounded like she was cheating:
"Oh, Stephan, kiss me again. Press that big cock of your against my wetness. Oh yes, push it in - let me savour your girth, pull back some so I can feel your foreskin roll back over you. God, that feels so good. Your are so much bigger, so much harder than my husband. Take me, fuck me, bump my cervix, fill me."
Mixed emotions rolled over me. Anger yes. But why was my cock straining against my briefs? It had been a long time since I was that hard. Was I ever that hard with my wife?
My thoughts turned back to our honeymoon. We opted not to try on the wedding night - too tired. But next morning, when we attempted to make love, I only got semi-hard. I concentrated my efforts on kissing, foreplay and giving oral. I brought her to orgasm. Then she asked me to enter her. I was soft and she saw it. "Never mind. Just eat my pussy again." At brunch, she wanted to talk about it. "That was wonderful. I was anxious about losing my virginity. I need not have worried. Let's have an intercourse free honeymoon. When we get home we can try intercourse but frankly I'm in no rush". I apologized for not being able to get hard. "No need to apologize, I had a wonderful time." The rest of the honeymoon we had lots of foreplay. I performed oral on her. She did not return the favour nor did I ask her to. This pattern continued after the honeymoon. About three weeks after our wedding I woke up in the nightl, my PJs wet, my wife awake. She smiled at me in the dim light and said: "Honey, you had quite the dream! You were talking in your sleep. You are such a naughty husband but I love you. It must be rare for a married man to have wet dreams but I love you just the way you are. Now, change you PJs and lets cuddle."
Of course we eventually did have intercourse but my wife tended to play it down. I'd only be semi-erect, not my full length or girth and I'd take forever to climax. She would masturbate while we made love, climax four or five times and ask me if I was close. Not really I would say. I'd pull out and remove my condom. Which was dry inside. When we were ready to try for a baby, there was no condom and I'd have a great climaxafter only 20 minutes or so of thrusting. I got her pregnant within a month, and after that she suggested we refrain from sex for fear of a misscarriage. Apparently that had happened to someone she knew. I was hoping we would have sex four months after the baby was born but she said she had no interest in sex.
So as I heard her moaning and softly speaking, I was aroused. Who was she with? Why would she have sex with him but shun me? Then I realized - I was average sized, maybe a bit below, not fully hard and unable to climax when wrapped.
I made up my mind to enter the bedroom, to confront them. I was not going to beat him up. I was not going to demand a divorce. I was going to catch them and see what they had to say. I stepped into the doorway - she was alone - masturbating - talking to herself. It was a fantasy. I stepped back out of the room, relieved.
But as I mulled things over, my thoughts grew weary: she does not want to have sex with me, yet she masturbates and fantasizes about another man. Does he exist? Are they doing it?
I went to the kitchen, pored a glas of water and swallowed the pill Dr. Stacey had prescribed. One per day said the label. I took a second one and went on the computer.
I reviewed the HIH webite with interest, the testimonials. I selected the PS New and ordered it. Then my wife came into the kitchen. "Oh, you're home. We have to talk."