Trigger warning: just feel I need to share everything see where I go from there abused and raped very young wasn’t till I was very old my blood dad was brought to justice, he was realised from jail about 2 years ago wasn’t aloud to know how he died where buried nothing was just left with he died on relise date, a lovely open wound no closure at all the other rapist died no trial , how did I cope I dint from the age of high school I beat walls up, playied chicken with buses, purged was anorexic as a kid then turned to cutting also tried to hang myself once rope snapped when I got too scared and too meany questions turned to binging and bulimia I used to carry around a order of funeral hoping I’d die and my wishes taken into consideration mum had a break down just after my blood dads trial was a 50 year old 5 year old still not 100% then some helpful neighbour got me wrongly arrested in a cell for a whole day for loving my mum said I did unspeakable things proved them wrong you just wounder is there a point to caring on caring some times I’m numb sometimes I want to give up wish if managed to hang if a animals in pain it’s put down why oh why do human haft to carry on suffering I just feel empty a numb like none would care if I died well thanks for reading hope you get in touch