Sending hugs. I know how bad the loneliness can get. Make some calls and see who will be around to spend some time with. It can't hurt. You can still have a bbq on Sunday............you do not need him to do it. I have my ex's family and mine coming over Sunday. I haven't changed a thing since he left. Only thing missing is him.................

This is new to you, and it will get better and you will figure out how to deal with time alone. If you are employed, enjoy.. because there are not that many days you get 3 in a row. This is a change, and for some, not having to cook or entertain or do anything, can be liberating! Stay in the present and keep looking forward. Holidays can have memories, but I would always think that not all those memories were great ones!

I belonged to athletic club that was quite social, events, parties etc.. and I met new people and women friends, that were also alone and divorced. I managed to afford it, because it was a life line for me. I had somewhere to go, and even if I just sat by the pool and read, I got out. I was not working then, and with no kids, no family it helped. My life changed and so did my social life during and after the divorce. Shopping was out also, but I did do the thrift... GWill here is like a department store and met a friend who loved to do that, so we'd go out. Thrift shopping is big right now! Many here have heard me say.. " Decorate then Date" When I did go back to work, I had more income so I painted and got new carpet... I should have purged more stuff. I got rid of all my living room furniture! Do as I say, not as I do... I should have got more done when I was alone! You do not always feel like and I do get that! I did a lot of what I call Coasting... and that is alright also. Do what you need to do to make it! HUGS

I agree that weekends and holidays can feel lonely now that I"m single.
I try to have 2 plans--one with other people and another in case the first plan falls through.
For example, I might make plans to go to dinner with friends, but also decide that I could go to a movie alone if the friends cancel.
That way I still have a plan.
I'm not saying this always works--sometimes I just don't feel like going out--but it feels more like it's MY choice.
((hugs))

Kellyb711 - I don't see anything wrong with trying to continue the cook out with your neighbors! Do they even know what's been going on at your house? If not, this might be the time to tell them and just say "I am feeling sort of odd man out right now, but continuing our tradition would really help me." I found that we have to let our friends KNOW what we are going through in order to give them the opportunity to be real friends to us!

For YEARS I always threw a Memorial Day gig here; close to 30 people; ribs from the place in town and everything else was pot-luck. I didn't have it in 2006 because I really wasn't up to it, but started doing it again in 2007 after the divorce was finally final. The only thing that had changed was the guest list -- some of the "old people" were off the A list, but there were new people who had taken their places.

This year, with having the farm up for sale, I decided to pass on the big party. We might have a couple of folks over on Monday, but it will be a pretty low key thing. Plus the forecast is for stinking hot and humid -- blecch! Nobody's favorite weather and so early, to boot.

Just take this one day at a time, my dear, but please DO say something to your neighbors who you normally do the Memorial Day gig with. You may be pleasantly surprised to find that they want to include you, but were just a little hesitant to ask.

Sending big hugs your way.

We've lived here for almost 22 years and have been very close with the neighbors - they know everything. Wives and I talk often, husband's are feeling uncomforable and don't really know how to act around me so avoid me.

You can still have BBQ with the neighbors - invite them! I know it sounds corny, but just because he's not around doesn't mean they don't like you does it?

Well, as I said the husbands wouldn't come because they feel too awkward. Also, the hubster took the grill.

aww, i get lonely on the weekends sometimes, i try to find things to do which can be a challenge in the rural area i live in. In town there is often concerts and things i try to go to and i have my next door neighbor(my best friend ever) i will go over to her house for Monday , there will be a cook out.
Try to find something to do ok but after a while you will not mind being home alone and sometimes you will actually hopefully learn to love it :)
((hugs))

I hope that your neighbors still ask you over - they will get over the awkwardness, I'm going to the cemetary tomorrow with my daughter, but that's it for the weekend for me. It's all good. I hope your not too lonely Kellyb. We are all here for you

Weekends can be a problem. How about a walk, a park, a good book or a DVD? They can all help. Maybe your neighbors will invite you. I hope so.

Hugs

Me too, especially lonely on the weekends, especially a 3 day weekend. Fortunately, I suppose, I've been so depressed, I have work deadlines overdue so that will take up some of the time. I have dinner planned with a friend,for tomorrow, and a walk on the beach and brunch for Sunday -- so at least I'll see someone at some point each of those days.. Monday I'll work and then go to the beach club. Even if I don't see anyone I know, lying by the pool will make a nice change from sitting at my computer
But, yeah, these are the times I really miss him... It used to be so easy to just hang out and have fun
Hugs and blessings to all

I came on this site alot at first to chat with others when i was lonely. Also I enjoy scrabble blast on the computer and also watch more tv. I know it is tough - I really miss my kids and my friends are really good to me but I am getting used to time alone. My problem is cooking for one as opposed to a family- hate that!
I would have a bbq with you!
Hugs
Cheryl