You have your beautiful babies. So there's plenty left. You have the best part of your marriage. You will know and love your children. You need to do this for them. Pick yourself up and dust yourself off. Today is the first day of the rest of your life. Don't give him any more power to hurt you. Many hugs coming your way.

i m sure when it is finally official, the pain wants to start up all over again.. its almost like we get numb with the divorce pain.. it becomes very natural.. then we have a new pain.. that its really over..my prayer is that in time, the emptiness we have is filled with laughter and love, and the broken parts of our lives heal with minimal scars..I know i will always love him even now after all the bull I would try... not going to happen but i would :( ) I keep reminding myself that the person I loved is NOT the person I see... sid is right..we have the best part of the marriage.. our kids.. Hugs and healing thoughts...

Give yourself some time fatallove. I too am newly divorced just a couple of weeks and it hit me harder than I thought it would too.

But I'm feeling better already. Getting used to the idea that I'm divorced and he is officially my X....although it still seems so surreal to me.

You have come so far and this is just another adjustment to make in this journey. I have no doubt that you will overcome, once again, this hurt and pain and start moving forward again.

I'm right here with you....all the way. You will never walk these steps alone.

Remember always.....no matter how you felt about him and your marriage, he is soooooo unworthy of YOU!!!!! You deserve a kind, decent, honest, loving and trustworthy man and he's not that man anymore.

Just hang in there a little longer and I promise the sun will shine once again in your life. Much love and hugs to you hon. I'm here for you....we all are.

It's been a long and painful journey for you. Be patient with yourself right now. It's not unusual for you to be impacted emotionally with this news. Han in there - K? We believe in you and love you. Time will again take this pain away. Big warm hugs.

I am sorry for your pain! I know I am heading in that direction and I keep saying I am ready for it to be over, yet I know it is going to reopen many of the wounds I have been trying to heal!

They will NEVER know the destruction they have caused! Please don't allow him to hurt you anymore! He doesn't deserve you and you deserve to be treated well!

Big hugs to you!! Sending you much love!

You are in my thoughts and prayers. I am sure this is so hard. I am not there yet, but I keep hearing that it is devastating. Reminds me of when someone is very ill and you know they are suffering and it's only a matter of time. Then when they do die, it hits you so hard. Suddenly it's irreversible and so very real. Please be strong and live. I know there are many who love you and that love will get you through this valley.

You have started a life affirming journey. I know this is hard, believe me, I know this is hard. But you are taking back your life and start by caring for yourself. Make yourself that special type of tea you love, or that coffee you love. Take a bubble bath, read a trashy novel, rent chick flicks all the time - eat everything you loved, but didn't cook because he hated it! Reclaim you life - start with baby steps and slowly but surely you will regain your footing. Come here and we will hug you, albeit virtually. Congratulations.

I, too, am sorry for your pain. I will be right where you are now in just a few months. I know it will be a sad day, but sld1 is right, you have the best part of our marriage. As my therepist told me, "now it's time for you to get your power back." One day you will look back of this and be amazed at how strong you are! Big hugs and love coming your way!

Take the time to let this sink and then step up and out. Its done. Lay it to rest in whatever way you can. Journal about it. Have a funeral for your marriage. Go somewhere alone and scream, yell and throw things. Whatever you need to release.

Then make a deal with yourself to look to the future. Hug those kids. Make the best life you can for you and your kids. It is whatever you make of it. You can do this!

Many hugs for you. Here for you!

You are already healing, just by talking about it here with these wonderful people. Keep talking, if you need to, and everyone here will listen. You are more than your grief. You are more than this divorce. You are a survivor, and you will come out of this stronger than you ever thought possible. I wish you all the best, and will be watching for your updates.

Ah, yes the Post-Final Divorce Blues. For me, when it was finally OVER, I hit the rock bottom pits. I had been blindsided, betrayed and THEN I had to go to war for what was rightfully mine! For 18 months, I had dealt with all the emotional devastation of being left and then discovering just what my stbx had been up to for MONTHS before he ran away. Then I had to play detective, paralegal, and forensic accountant. It was long, drawn out and ugly. But once it was over, I realized that I had not had time to mourn the loss of the marriage.
That is when I finally took the time to rest and nuture my soul. I was pretty down for about 6 weeks...moving through my days like a zombie. You are blessed in that you have children -- my daughter had been grown and gone for years, so I was pretty much alone here with just my horses and cats and a 7-acre farm to tend to.
My therapist helped tremendously in this time and I eventually dropped back to seeing her every other week instead of once or twice a week as I had for the 18 months of Hell. I found that I really missed connecting with her for an hour and a half each session!
Be good to yourself, like everyone here has advised. You don't have to decide the rest of your life right this minute. One day at a time. Look for something wonderful, amazing or beautiful in each and every moment and each and every day. Stay in touch with your faith; talk to God. Ask for guidance and strength as you move forward into the REST OF YOUR LIFE...and vow to make it the BEST OF YOUR LIFE.
We have all been given the opportunity to learn about ourselves through the process of unwanted divorce. We have (hopefully) discovered that we, indeed, made some bad choices along the way or conveniently overlooked some signs of trouble along the way in our marriages. FORGIVE YOURSELF. When I was finally able to forgive myself for missing, overlooking or just plain ignoring the signs that something was terribly wrong in my marriage is when I truly began to heal. SOMETHING WONDERFUL WILL HAPPEN FOR YOU -- when you are truly ready! I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

I am not at this point yet, so I cannot speak to the feelings. I just want you to know that you are not alone, we are all here to pick you up and help you start your new and fulfilling life. We do have the best part of our marriages, our kids. Hugs!

I'm so sorry for your pain. Those of us who have received our papers can relate to all you are feeling. Mine came in the mail 2 years ago (as of April 5th) I still can remember the details of the event. It brought me to my knees in the middle of my kitchen floor. But, I am nowhere near that person anymore. I beleive that in time you will be able to use your experience to help others with their pain. In the mean time...Hugs to you.

You are definitely not alone but it sure feels like it, doesn't it? Just yesterday I was reflecting on how my life and emotions have changed. And while I still have things to go through, it's so much better. But it's a tough road and sometimes you feel alone. But just keep moving forward, read all you can to learn and get through the emotions and most of all, let yourself FEEL the emotions. When you do, they will dissipate sooner. I know it sounds weird, because it seems like all we want to do is stop the pain, but just speaking from experience, when I take the time to process and FEEL what I am going through, it does feel better sooner and sooner.

Big hugs to you!