Kellyb, you said it all right there -- one step forward and two steps back -- that is the way of grief! But keep in mind that you WILL get through this, just like us old timers have done. It's a process -- and one that, unfortunately, doesn't happen overnight.

The best piece of advice from my therapist (when I was going through it) was this: BE GENTLE WITH YOURSELF! Keep your faith in yourself and your faith in your Higher Power. KNOW that this is only temporary and that better days are ahead.

Keeping you in my thoughts and prayers today.

That's why this journey is a rollercoaster ride. When I'm said I just let it come. I try not to wallow in it, and pick myself up. When I feel good, I tend to wonder why I feel good-I am trying to learn to dwell on those good times.

Meant sad instead of said

For sure the days go up and down. I think the best is to try and think only in the moment. ( I know easier said than done!) I know we all have those times even after many years although fewer and father inbetween. Here's a hug and hoping that you feel better today- be nice to yourself and eat chocolate!
Hugs
Cheryl

You are doing the best you can.. and you are in the what if stage.. and seeing futures for him and you. Most of us were there. I have said this many times before, I admire all that hold down a job during a divorce, and that is most! I have heard that for some this is a blessing, they can concentrate on work and leave it behind, and for others that they have breakdowns and are overwhelmed. That is the crappy truth. Somehow you have to find a balance.

It does get better for most of us. I said in a earlier post that many here right now are in the early part, and that is where it is day to day, step by step. You do have to work at it, and most of us, heard it will get better, but you really have to experience it. Don't expect it all to get done asap. You did not get into this in a long term marriage overnight, and you will not get out of this overnight. Hang in there! HUGS

The 1st year is the absolute worst. Its when the roller coaster travels fast and hard. Emotions go up and down like a yo-yo. The 1st year is when you experience all the 1st's of everything without the ex. The 1st Christmas, the 1st anniversary, the 1st Birthday...etc. Its just a rough time. Once all the 1st's are over with it starts to get a bit better. You see you lived through the worst and you dont dread them as much anymore. Healing starts then. Hang on to and enjoy your reprieves and know it wont last...but...as time goes by it happens more often and for longer lengths of time. Remember how you felt when you were having a good day and keep that feeling close to you. Use it as a goal to aspire towards while your having a bad day. Know that the bad day wont be here forever. Before you know it...your good days will outweigh the bad ones. Hang in there Kelly...your doing great...Big Hugs...Kathy

Hang in at your job..hopefully you have a manager that you can confide in that you are going through a rough patch. But hang in there! I took a stress leave...and they let me go. So for awhile, I was involved in TWO legal issues (I've settled with my employer now though..yeah, I won!)

Kelly, there will be brighter days ahead hon. It's so hard to see that at the beginning...we all know and remember! The memory of loss and betrayal never really leaves us...but the PAIN does!

Keep moving forward and keep getting back up when you feel down. And like CGK says, be gentle on yourself. Don't second guess and feel GUILTY for feeling sad...it's all part of the process.

You will make it hon! Best