Divorce after Twenty years together Community Group

I want to start something for those of us that were married for a long long time. I think that we face a little different issues than those who were dating for a few years or even married for shorter period of time. Being married for so long we have older children some have grandkids dealing with teenagers and their reaction to the divorice empty nesters dating after 40...

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/ Divorce after Twenty years together Support Group

I BROKE DOWN

rbsingle1959
rbsingle1959
I came across a video (without wanting) of a church retreat I had attended back in March 2010 and just had to let it all out. I cried and sobbed uncontrollably as it brought back those horrific memories. I was in that church retreat when my ex spouse was actually leaving me while i was away. I just remembered it all as it happened yesterday. I felt the pain of having to return from my retreat and weekend get away just to return home and find out my husband had left his family without notice of any kind. Here I was enjoying myself in the things of God while he was packing and getting on a plane to return to his ex girlfriend from 23 yrs ago. What a guy!!!! The pain is sometimes as vivid as when it happened and then sometimes I just dont care. I do often wonder if he thinks today even after 2 yrs that he made the best choice ever.
whiskeytangofoxtrot
whiskeytangofoxtrot
((((hugs))))

I think we've all done it.
sfsoccermom
sfsoccermom
There are many triggers along the way that can cause the breakdown. It's okay to let it out. It only helps in your continued healing.
KRKing911
KRKing911
(Hugs)
hurtinandhealin2560
hurtinandhealin2560
I'm sorry that video has brought you pain. As sfsoccermom says, there will be many triggers on this journey. Sending you healing hugs.
trisha9054
trisha9054
There will be many triggers and as you deal with them it will get a bit easier. (((HUGS)))
tobywinn
tobywinn
((((hugs))))

There's a saying " The wise person builds their house while the foolish one tears their down with their own hands". What matters is the choice the ex had made, he owns and it represents his truths, destructiveness. I know the healing from great disappointments can set you back at times. Remind yourself of having been delivered to safe keeping and God has rid of the impure people away, for you are so precious.
deleted_user
deleted_user
(((((((((cyber hugs)))))))))
Atpeacemary
Atpeacemary
God was keeping you safe in his loving arms that day. It is OK to let go and cry. You will find that you will cry less and less as times goes on. It is still early in the game. Please be kind to yourself. I still cry at times and it will be 5 yrs this Sept.
lycesq
lycesq
Giving you all my best. Yes, it is hard. A big hug to you!
deleted_user
deleted_user
I agree with Knuckle. God was building you up so you would be able to have strength for the difficult journey. So sorry you had to go through this. It really really hurts. We do all cry and sometimes it is a good thing to let it out.
Hugs
Cheryl
JaMama
JaMama
Ugh! The things that can trigger our grief. I suppose that it is all neccessary so that we can let go and move more toward Him. I had such a wonderful support system in my previous town. I found out the extent of his lies shortly after we moved away from there. It took me 5 years to leave. Partly because I didn't want to let go, and partly to prepare myself to be able to go. If I had been with my dear friends I may have leaned on them. As it is, I have had to grow in many ways. It has been rough. Just me and God.

Hard days will turn into hard moments. It won't always feel like this.
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