Ask people you know that have been divorced. I got the names from people that have been through it and my mediator. When the same name kept popping up repeatedly I went with him. Plus, you have to connect with them. You can even go and sit through court and see if you like someone. If you think your stbx will cooperate, write it up with the help of an attorney and you can do it very inexpensive. Good luck.

I agree with sld1, it helps to get referrals BUT that doesn't necessarily mean they'll be good for you. I think it's the luck of the draw. If you don't have a big mess to straighten out, you'll probably do fine with a couple looks yourself or good comments about one. They're just people - like you and me. I had an attorney a while back who I was told was great, but when I needed her she was in an emotional pickle herself. She was difficult to get a hold off, not too concerned about my problem and just basically didn't seem to into her job - she had other problems. Another, years ago I found out was an alcoholic himself - actually he did a better job then the latter. Good luck on your search. I don't mean to disappoint you - I'm sure there are many good ones too.

Do you have any lawyer friends? Anyone who works for a lawyer? When I went hunting I asked my girlfriend who's husband is a liability/malpractice lawyer. He gave me three names. I called each...first impression, did I feel compassion from the secretary...I'm going to get to know her. In the office, was I calmed? When "I" walked in I said I do not want to bulldog this into the ground, but I want what's fair. That impressed her. Pick someone who's in THAT court system...in THAT county and sees that judge or group of judges...they will know what you stand to get or not, how that judge is likely to rule. You want to hear them say...even if it really hurts...that they are conservative in what they "think" you'll get...but you shoot for the sky, you can always drop altitude. Be prepared to do a ton of your own legwork...it makes your case better. Finally...be VERY careful who you speak to about your case, be secretive...people report back and that can hurt you. I wish you great luck. Oh...and the pay cut, regardless, ask your attorney to prove that since he WAS capable of that income, he STILL is, therefore he may have to try harder and you may be awarded at the higher capable rate.

I think you need to go with someone you are comfortable with, but just be sure that you have someone that is fighting for you! If he has been dipping into money,...don't let him get away with that! You may have some recourse! I remember the step of actually doing it was difficult, but it may help you with the acceptance of it all! I agree that he may be assessed at a rate of what he is capable of, not what he is making now! Good luck and hang in there!!!
Big hugs to you!

We had a long post about this awhile back, I can not find it.. here is something I use to give to others, this is for women, not about men.. sorry.

I did not have an retainer contract, but that is something that spells out the terms of payment between you and a lawyer, but I never signed one, I did it on a handshake, and I had the deal of the century.. I had the very best lawyer.. in practice a long time, well known and respected. I also was prepared, knew my stuff, did what he asked as far as doing what he said in terms of getting paperwork done or delivering what he wanted. Divorce is somewhat about being fair, it is more about being reasonable and compromise, but is in the end it is what you can live with. A good lawyer doesn't make decisions for you, he helps you come to a good decision, you must know what you need and what you will settle for.. I have some other items about this, I will try and find them in my computer!

You may want to avoid lawyers who:
Are general practitioners and donâ??t specialize in family law
Have reputations for being aggressive and are disliked by lawyers and judges
Have less than five years of family law experience
Represent substantially more men than women
Take a majority of their clientsâ?? divorce cases to trial
Wonâ??t go to trial under any circumstances, even if necessary
Donâ??t handle child custody and support issues (if applicable)
Charge hourly fees you canâ??t afford
Refuse to use written retainer contracts
Are confusing and donâ??t answer questions clearly
Make you feel uncomfortable
You may want to choose a lawyer who:
Has a reputation for being well-liked, respected and successful
Represents an equal number of men and women or mostly women
Has five to ten years of family law experience
Is a family law specialist certified by your stateâ??s bar association
Has family law trial experience in your cityâ??s courts
Is familiar with the family law judges and lawyers in your city
Successfully settles a large number of cases
Charges reasonable hourly fees you can afford
Always uses written retainer contracts
Is a good listener, explains things to you clearly and answers your questions
Makes you feel comfortable and assured

One more thing, my ex had a lawyer who was a Fellow of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers and that is not a bad thing.. he was a good lawyer, suited to my ex's personality, and mine was a top criminal and family attorney, with a ton of experience, a Superlawyer, "Top 100 lawyers in my state, and very suited to me and my personality.. after months of doing a lot of it ourselves, I felt the weight of the burden life off of me when I hired him..

I had a woman lawyer about 10 years ago that was the President of the American Bar Association refered to me by my mom's lawyer, 180 miles away, she was great also. My current lawyer was refered to me by a professional and personal friend that I respect, his son interned with him, and he represented his daughter in her divorce. This is the best kind of referral..