Divorce after Twenty years together Community Group
I want to start something for those of us that were married for a long long time. I think that we face a little different issues than those who were dating for a few years or even married for shorter period of time. Being married for so long we have older children some have grandkids dealing with teenagers and their reaction to the divorice empty nesters dating after 40...
Holidays are such a joy for the divorced, arent' they? My ex is Mr. Passive so he never made any attempt to invite our kids to his house or interrupt their traditions at home. Instead I invited him (at least to Christmas for past 2 years). This year, not happening since he's in a relationship. Kids have no idea she lives with him. He tends to not face any situations that could be awkward. This year I told him kids would stop to visit his father before coming to my celebration. Ex says "My dad won't be home" "Where will he be?" (had to drag it out of him). "At my house" he says. I say, "Oh. ok. did you mention this Thanksgiving dinner to your children?" Granted, I don't want them to go, but I also don't want them to feel that their father did not think to invite them!
So, now that I prompted it, he decides to invite them. Bad side - I'll have to share the day with his celebration. The kids will be uncomfortable because they hate the GF, and dismayed to find out she lives there and they were not told. Good side - is there one? lol???
My poor son, now will have to go 3 places - his GF's dinner too. Hope they don't get too full! Oh life!!
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I had gone to the grocery store. When I wheeled my cartback to my car I just stool there a minute. A few spacesaway a Tesla Cyber truck was parked. I had seen it on theroad a few times for a few seconds. But not close up.It looked like it belonged to 2126 and not 2026. I wasgoing to take a picture of the car but the owners cameback and drove away. It was an ordinary middle age...

I prayed and begged to have him die in his sleep or be run over by a bus. I know that this would hurt the kids but it would be easier in the long run. ( at least that;s what I thought)
Now five years out, and kids are teens. They don't talk to their father, and he never calls them
I have to be honest in the fact that I wish he did. I wish my kids had the trouble of going to multiple houses. I know they are hurting and they miss him so much.
Why don't they invite their kids, why don't they show the same respect for their own flesh and blood as they do their new partners.
This is a question we all struggle with.
I also don't know why they think they can keep things secret. If your moving in with someone tell your kids, tell them before you as the person to move in. If you are getting married, tell your kids first.
Ihope your son can find joy at all three houses. Can you have your dinner the next day, or can you do a brunch. That way no one is running from house to house for the same meal
(((HUGS)))