Divorce after Twenty years together Community Group

I want to start something for those of us that were married for a long long time. I think that we face a little different issues than those who were dating for a few years or even married for shorter period of time. Being married for so long we have older children some have grandkids dealing with teenagers and their reaction to the divorice empty nesters dating after 40...

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/ Divorce after Twenty years together Support Group

Bills wait for no one

Kellyb711
Kellyb711
I was having a fairly good morning until I sat at my desk and paid some bills. I'm just now getting out of the fog enough to start getting organized. I noticed that my AmEx bill, that I've been paying on for years (a business venture that didn't pan out) was at 28% interest. Apparently I was late twice and not only paid late fees, now I have to pay "penalty interest". I called and spoke to a supervisor and told her that my husband left, that it was an extordinary event in my life, and they had a choice of lowering the rate or I would file bankruptcy and they wouldn't get anything. Well, I'm SOL. Of course I won't file bankruptcy, but I just couldn't stop the flood gates. Now I'm just pissed as hell and in a rotten mood. Seems that divorce is the gift that just keeps on giving.
Misred
Misred
(((HUGS)))
Kellyb711
Kellyb711
Just one more thing I was blaming him for.
Atpeacemary
Atpeacemary
Why are you paying for it. Is it under your card or a joint one If it is joint, he should be paying his share too. I would not let him get away with it. I am going to find out what the heck is a penalty interest. I have an AMEX card but zero balance. If that is the case, I am cancelling it. 28% that is ridiculous. Beyond comprehension of my little mind. hugs and hang in there
CowgirlKathi
CowgirlKathi
Really! 28% interest -- you might as well go to a loan shark! That stinks big time! I would see if you can get some kind of bill consolidation loan from a local bank. At 28%, you will never get it paid off.
Kellyb711
Kellyb711
The card is in my business name "enjoy life enterprises" , now defunct, and yes he does give me money. It really wasn't a matter of not having the money, I've just been such a zombie and wasn't taking care of the responsibilities. I did let AmEx know that I would do everything in my power to let the public know waht a*holes they were. But good advice, I will go to my bank for a personal loan, the balance is only 5k, but at that rate I'll never get it paid off.
kamary
kamary
Bugger! As we say in Australia when things are not going well.

I also found myself paying some extra interest during the settlement and divorce days through lack of clear thinking. In the end, I started a special file - a red one - for ""Bills Due"" and made myself keep it up to date. No more missed accounts.

I also enter the date bills are due in my appointment diary. That way, I don't miss them if I'm away from home.

Looks like you have a way out. That's great.
iammine
iammine
Kelly, I really struggled with managing my finances at the beginning. STBX always paid the bills, and of course, with our combined incomes it was manageable. But those days are over for good! I had no idea that it cost so much to watch tv - cable is ridiculous!

The financial aspect of divorce is both depressing and PRESSING...many issues and certianly bills just won't wait! I suggest you work with a friends who is good with organizing and finances to help you...there is NO shame in needing financial advice. We go to lawyers for legal advice, teachers for education, doctors to make us well...yet so many of us struggle with our own finances!

Good luck - hope you can find a system that works for you!
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