My ex would not speak to our two adult children for over two years during the divorce, they reached out to him over and over and got silence from him. It broke my heart and angered me to see them treated this way.
After the divorce he started acting like their father again and they have made up. (Yay)
His excuse for treating them so dreadfully was "he was in a bad place", Such a lame excuse in my humble opinion but whatever. They get along now and I have let it go and even I get along with him again (with a distance of 700 miles between us, LOL)

I suppose you could call it a step in recovery but for sure it is 100% normal :)

Most definitely normal emotional reaction to what's happening in your life right now, nohappy.

I found it helps to have my opinion of my ex substantiated by his bad behaviour. When I got so angry recently, he'd been disrespectful of me. Your ex has been disrespectful, too. Anger follows hurt and shame. Any wonder we got angry? I'm not angry any more. Now I am calm and clear in the knowledge that I know who I'm dealing with, that he hasn't changed, and that I need to continue to be wary of him.

My daughter recently told me that she sees very little of her father - that he's always off somewhere - that she sees him for an hour or two at most every so often. Why am I not surprised?! That's how I lived the last 20 years of my married life with him. He hasn't changed.

I guess I hoped the divorce would make him look at his own part in the breakdown of our marriage. I'm still hoping he'll become that man I married even now. I really have to come to grips with the fact that he is not that man and probably never will be again. You too?

love and hugs
kamary

You are burning the candle @ both ends. You need to slow down a bit and take some time for you. It's all normal the way you feel, but you are tired which probably magnifies it. REST!!!

what is rest? lol I have been working steady now since may 8th. It slows down next month on the one job so I will be more on 2nd. not overtime anymore either so days off will come every week. then I can rest.

kamary I think you hit it in the head. I was hoping somewhere along the way he would become the man I married. Not realizing of course that that man doesnt exist anymore. He was a sham. Had me fooled from
day one. But I was hoping. Now I am just going with the fact he won't, doesn't want to and probably can't. He is what he is, yes. And I don't want what he is. Whatever my sons decide is their choice. As of now, that looks like it will just be our family here and the ass there. so be it.

Totally normal and it made me smile. While I was going through the roughest part of my divorce, I would go in to my counselors office and say, "Is this normal" and once he said it was, I could just not work through it and not panic. It's good to check and make sure we're on the right track. Good job