Developing a Positive Attitude DAPA Community Group

Hi, This group is dedicated to helping people develop a positive attitude. It is for all depression sufferers, anybody who suffers from anxiety or stress, has suffered bad experiences in the past, or anyone who desires to develop a more positive attitude through positive thinking.

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supportplease 02/05/2009

I'm just wondering how much of your true self you share with your friends or family. I find that I hide alot because I either feel ashamed or people are really not interested or will think less of me.

I am basically a very truthful person, but in this regard I'm not being truthful...I'm sort of with-holing the truth or lieing. For example, recently it came up that a friend was boasting about how close her son was with the father. I lied and told her that my daughter and dad were real close too, even tho that is not true and they fight all the time.

Am I a liar? I feel like I'm sort of living a lie, but what do I do? Share all the details of my homelife even if they are not something I'm proud of?

When is it truth vs. lieing and when is it just being private?

Shelly4 02/05/2009

I tend to be extremely open to a fault. In that I share details of my life very openly and sometimes it is more than people want to hear.

I think "being private" is just that. It is withholding information that is not pertinent to a conversation and sometimes withholding what is. The more I make up or lie about, the more I will have to continue to cover my tracks. I would worry more about getting caught in the lie. In the case you speak of it does not seem it was necessary at all to lie about what you did. You could have just told her that it was great they got along so well and left it at that. That might indicate that you are very uncomfortable about the relationship your daughter and husband have. Keeping that private would be to just keep it to yourself and not feel embarassed about it. Not all people live the same life support. We all have our "secrets" or embarassments.

Hugs

deleted_user 02/07/2009

I personally feel that we are all just trying to be "normal" and fit in where we otherwise don't feel that we do. I share more with you guys than with Ken. You will always except me as I am. It's the illness and I don't make any excuses for it. It's the way it is. I try to talk to him, he doesn't get it. PTSD and Bipolar are destructive and may cause us to fib more often but not be liers. There's a big difference to me. Barb-Detroit

supportplease 02/08/2009

I consider myself a truthful person but I am not truthful when it comes to sharing my home life. I "lie" to cover up for how it is because I don't want anyone to know.

deleted_user 02/09/2009

I usually tell the truth, until or when it may hurt someone.Sometimes the truth is needed, othertimes the truth may be too much for certain of us to bare.

deleted_user 02/10/2009

I used to think I was truthful with myself and everyone else in my life, but have discovered that I've hidden a lot of emotions. My goal is to continue to learn about myself and share with myself and those people.

Keeping things locked up inside only hurts us.

As to your question. How close are you to this person? If you are close, confiding and sharing will help you...especially if they can just mainly listen...when we talk to people we can figure out things easier I find.

If you don't feel close, I would give a short answer. No is usually my short answer to unwanted favours asked, but in this situation, maybe just, "not the best", or bypass it.

deleted_user 02/10/2009

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