So I just created this group. My hope is that people will find support for a complex situation from what I am discovering, most people don't usually understand.

One struggle I have found is when people tell me they are sorry for my loss. I know that is a normal response and most people have loving, caring parents with some flaws. My situation was an abusive parent who wasn't loving and caring. My abusive parent who was narcissistic, anti-social, and borderline personality disorder. Not a fun combination. 

So when people tell me they are sorry for my loss, in the back of my head, the message is "I'm sorry your abuser died." Logically I know that is not true what they are saying and are being sincere in their condolences.  

My hope is more awareness and support will be available to all who have had an abusive parent that died because grief is so much more complicated.