If you dont tell her, it seems like you are saying it is diminishing your relationship. If you do tell her, it may restore your relationship or it may further diminish it. In the past when you told her, it did not kill it. If you are like many crossdresses, this may be a lifelong behavior.

Angela CD

I am coming to terms with the fact that I must tell her in one form or another. One of my core principles ie honesty particularly honesty with those that I love. Lying in fact or even by ommission has been destroying my soul.

The only way I can forgive myself now is by telling the truth.

I have learnt so much from my friends here and the fact that I am able to openly talk about these thingd has been a liberating experience.

I think I have a way now. The thing that attracted my wife most to me I believe is that I have a strong female side to my personality I am nuturing, caring, empathic and compassionate.

I think that if I can make my wife understand the importance of the female side of my personality to her, she will in the end be fully accepting of me.

i realy do feel for you !! the situation and guilt you'r feeling must be awful !!? i think you have to tell her again and hope you'r relationship can weather the storm ?? i am so lucky with my wife we used to go out and walk around the lingerie stores !!realy good un and all the more horny when she's showing me things and other people dont realise that there for me !!! and that i'm wearing stockings and sussies etc under my masculin atire ha ha ha trust is everything to us and when we met i was out on a fun drunken drag day in town ?? it was then that i ended up sitting on her lap in a lovely velvety hippy skirt and top while she checked out my tats lol since then i have done allsorts with her ,and long may t continue !!hopefully for you too ?? take care my friend and lets hope you'r situation clears it's self YOU HAVE TO BE YOU !!! good luck paul (willow) xx

The funny thing is that I don't feel the urge to crossdress anymore. Not right now at least.

The fact that I do not feel the need to do this suprisingly as it may seem comes from my acceptance of this part of me.

My acceptance of this has opened me up to the power of the feminine side of my personallity which seems to make me very charismatic to people particularly women.

One thing that has astounded me is how many 'normal' people on DS are prepared to accept me as I am when my information is right there in front of them. For some reason it seems that women are more willing to show their acceptance of me in this respect than men.

hugs well i think that there needs to be more information for her then the cding fact.

Support group, counsleing you can not push her by any means. You have to be really assuring and have patience.

I dont know what to say... It will hurt her more finding out you hid it from her.
Honesty will hurt too.

You got to be honest with yourself you know her better then i do..
what are her beliefs her views.. Her in general..

If she isnt strong enough to handle this can you two remain friends for your son?
Or parent together... The possibilties are endless..

Hugs
carrie

In my humble opinion there are some groups at this site that quite simply should not be ALLOWED to be, sadly, this is one of them. Lieing and feeling guilty over what exactly. Who REALLY cares other than YOU what YOU do in YOUR own personal individual time? How do YOU forgive YOURSELF? Stop lieing about YOURSELF in life generally, that would be a good starting point, and then track back and seek forgiveness from those whom YOU really have betrayed, YOURSELF most definitely not being one of them.

Right now I am currenly seperated but I spend large periods of time with my son and wife. For me the most important thing with respect to my relationship is that my son does not suffer and that my relationship with my wife is as good as it can be given the circumstances.

As part of accepting myself I had to forgive myself. I was wrong to hide who I was for so long but then the society that we live in does not make it easy for us.

Flying, I feel for you. My heart bleeds. I'm unsure of how to even begin to wonder how you managed to just stop. Stopping and ignoring it are two different things. You cannot simply stop doing something that is apart of you. Could you stop eating? Breathing? Even if it made someone who claims to love you yet disapproves to the point of hurting your relationship feel better? I myself have never understood the concept of just not doing it anymore. I have no need to validate my reasonings for anything I do in life to anyone.

Kudos to you, sir, for telling her early on in the relationship. I've read ALOT of stories online where they hide it and it comes back and destroys everything. But what frightens me is that people could actually try and purge a part of themselves to make someone feel better. I could never, and will never stop doing something that makes me feel better than hurts no one. I will go out of my way to help that person gain acceptance or at least understand why its unfair to expect me to just stop being myself to please them, but if they blatently just refuse, there are always more fish in the sea. Ones who are not only tolerant but beyond accepting about it. My girlfriend always wants to go shopping with me but of course, im so shy that , i just order online. But really, I do wish you the best with your wife, separated or otherwise. I do hope you can work things out but, just be proud of whom you are. Don't change for someone else.

Remember. Rule #1 of life: Cover your own ass before worrying about what others think or do. Don't change your beautiful self in hopes of gaining acceptance. <3