Hi, whenever I've really struggled with something, and nothing else has worked (This is going to sound crazy, but it works, at least for me), going on a 1 to 3 day fast has always helped. I generally only give up solid foods (I'll still drink milk or coffee o what have you), but some people give up everything but water, and I have one friend who actually gives up everything including water (you shouldn't do that one, called a total fast, for more than 3 days, as water is very, very nesseccary, and I personally don't reccommend that one at all, but it's up to you.). Anyway, that's what has helped me in the past, but I would reccommend you pray to God and see what he wants you to do, trust not in man, but God. Anyway, best wishes, and God bless!

I think I suggested earlier, on another panel, that you draw up a "Fire Drill" that lists all of the things you can do when you are tempted. The list might include such things a praying, journaling about your feelings, jogging around the block, listening to some music, calling a friend or support person, etc. Make copies of your list, and place a copy wherever you might be when you are tempted: in your purse, in your car glove box, in your desk at work, by your computer at home, etc. That way, when temptation hits, you'll have a list of ways to avoid it all drawn up and ready to go. All you'll need to do is take action, and sometimes, that can be the toughest step of all.

The second suggestion I think I also made to you at the same time as the first. Write a letter from yourself, to yourself. In it, outline all of the good that has come from your recovery so far, as well as the positive results that might logically be expected from abstaining now. Then, list all of the consequences that have resulted in the past from acting out, and the possible consequences that might occur should you have a "slip" now. Some people do this in a two paragraph fashion, while others do the lists in a side-by-side fashion. Whichever way works for you will be fine. Again, make copies and leave a copy wherever you have a copy of the "Fire Drill".

Everybody is different, and what works for me might not work for you. Of course, the reverse of that is also true. But for me, the best thing I can do is say a short prayer. Oftentimes, simply praying, "Father, please help me" is enough to get me out of my addictive frame of mind. But you'll have to figure out what works for you. Good luck.

I remember someone telling me once that to get rid of an unwanted thought is to focus your attention away from the thought, to get busy doing something else and true enough before you know it, it's gone.

Another trick I use is the: "Thanks for sharing" statement and it quiets my mind. The issue here is that I am reminding myself that I am putting more importance to the thought, calling it bad and unwanted, but in reality it is just a thought.

Example: I may think: "Gee it is raining outside" If I come from an unwanted aspect, then I'll call it bad and it turns into a litany of, "Dang it! I'll need a raincoat, I won't be able to go camping, etc.. Yadda, yadda." Thus losing precious minutes because it has snowballed into a huge issue. If I had just stopped it at what it was which was a statement of fact and sought solutions, it would have cut my time considerably.

So if I were to think, for instance, "Gee, Angelina Jolie has a nice figure." It could snowball into places I dare not venture, not because it is a ghastly thought per se but it can very well permutate into one or several billion thoughts and off the wagon I go. So, what do I do? Well, I say, "Thanks for sharing." and do something else not remotely related to what I just thought. I don't punish myself or feel guilty which by the way makes it worse.

Remember this:"It's never the thought, it's what is done with the thought that's the issue." And if all else fails, try Psalm 23. Reason being is that the very psalm affirms who is truly running your life, making your crooked places straight, so to speak. It has a tendency to calm me down.

Peace,
Wolf

I don't know where else to post this, i am in SO MUCH MENTAL PAIN!! My heart has been crushed! but I had to do it! because a man promise to marry me and 2 other women, He stated he has really gone through "strong holes" he has stated numerous times the he has a problem staying staying with one women.or He states" he had a problems with wanting liking a variety of women, he stated he made a stake" by leaving me", but then i found out the that the woman is moving with him. he had women he wound married them" Because i smoked, social drink, when all this was explained to him before i moved. I was real with him. I said to him.".he had 2 months to get rid of that if he wanted me in his life., what is this lust for multiple women, desire-ring, having thoughts of having multi woman. he was once, twice , 3 times drug abuser, i think a 4 year sobriety. HELP[ ME PLEASE I NEED TO UNDERSTAND what is wrong with me that he can say and drop me, he even public post. anyway Sad part of it all i love this man. how am i to react? he make me feel less than! l am having Anxiety here!!!

I got to get on my knees, this is too much!