Hi, I'm posting this here, as opposed to the other sexual addict group, because I need Christian advice. We all know that we are to forgive (regardless of whether or not the other person deserves it, or has asked for it.) In addition to that, if the person has confessed, repented, and is turning from their ways, we are to forgive as well. (I say we are to forgive, becaust the bible says to forgive our enemies....I dont' know of any time that a person would be an enemy and asked for forgiveness.) Anyway, my question is this: My husband is having difficulty forgiving me for what I've done. On one level, I understand, but on another level I don't. He says that to him, forgiveness can't be offered, and have the bad feeling remain. To me, that makes no sense (from a biblical view.) It's almost like whether or not he is justified in feeling hurt and angry, that he would rather hold on to those, than to forgive. To me it seems prideful and stubborn. He is refusing to forgive because he hurts, and he "can't just turn them off" (the feelings.) I would think this, even if it wasn't me that was the object of his unforgiveness. He is feeling physically ill, because of his emotions, and while I do think he will continue to feel them, justifiably; am I wrong to think that offering forgiveness is a step toward loosing the hold those emotions have on him? I have said I am sorry I don't even know how many times, I've confessed and repented to the Lord, and I'm actively seeking recovery. I guess I just don't see what is left to keep him from forgiving me. Our humanity may keep us from being able to stop feeling our emotions, so I don't expect that, but I just want to yell at him sometimes...just forgive!!! (Again, I'd feel this way even if it weren't about this situation.) Any thoughts???
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