So, I've pretty much accepted the estrangement I have with three of my children (foster adopted sibling group), but now I'm dealing with issues with two of my bio children. My oldest daughter only wants to talk to us when SHE wants to talk to us (don't contact me, I'll contact you attitude) and our oldest son pretty much doesn't call or write or text at all. Neither of them are very prone to answering our communications to them in any form. My oldest daughter once said she would rather not hear from us more than perhaps once a month. She established a family chat group on what'sapp and it seems the only ones using it are me and my husband. We keep things light and often share links that are helpful, informative, or entertaining. Last night she (as administrator of the group) told us NOT to post links (the tenor of what she said was that no one was interested in the things we wanted to share). And if that weren't bad enough, my oldest son who pretty much NEVER participates in the group, said that the group chat looked like his SPAM box because of the links (in other words he considered the things we wanted to share with our adult children as pure rubbish). This was the last straw for me and my husband. We removed ourselves from the family chat. We still have what'sapp for them individually but I have blocked them. I need a break. They can't tell that we have blocked them just that any messages they send on what'sapp will not appear on my phone and will not be answered. So perhaps they will begin to wonder why we are not answering them and they will call. We MIGHT answer. So done. We still have their email and they ours as well as our mobile numbers and landlines so we are not cutting communication, we are just not going to be contacting them but on a very rare basis. Honestly, when my husband calls our oldest son, my husband does most of the talking otherwise there are long awkward periods of silence cuz the son doesn't contribute. It makes our call to him feel very unwelcome to us.
Anyway, licking my wounds today and trying to see what's up with adult children treating their parents like this. We had a very good homelife when they were at home and this treatment has really kicked us in the gut as there is no explanation for it from what we can see. Found out we are so not alone in experiencing this and thought I would share some of what I found with you in case any of you are going through this with children whose treatment of you is so bad you wish they WERE estranged as it would be far less painful than the continues disrespect, abuse, and neglect. And it's NOT what is said in the blog that struck me but the comments that tell the blogger she is full of hogwash as they tell of their own experiences with their adult children. Check this out and read the comments

http://drkathleenmccoy.blogspot.ie/2011/02/parents-and-adult-children-finding.html