CHRISTIAN PARENTS of ESTRANGED ADULT CHILDREN Community Group
Estrangement makes it difficult to talk about with family, friends, neighbors and church members. Christians are NOT immune to broken families. Talk about your experiences with those who know how you feel and get positive support through your Christian faith...."In these last days difficult times will come, for men will be lovers of self...disobedient to parents,...
I ran across this article and found it helpful. Maybe you will as well.
Learning How to Accept Your New Normal
February 24, 2012 at 3:04am
Acceptance
To be able to move on and heal from grief, no matter what the source of the grief, we have to be able to accept our new reality, or new circumstances.
Here are two definitions of the word "acceptance". Coming to terms with something: the realization of a fact or truth and the process of coming to terms with it. 2. Toleration: the toleration of something without protest.
Acceptance is realizing that life has changed and probably will never be the same again. Acceptance is looking toward the future and it's possibilities and not living in the past. Acceptance is adapting physically, emotionally and spiritually to your life's changes. Acceptance is the path to moving away from the pain of grief.
Here are some spiritual thoughts on acceptance, conquering, embracing and overcoming adversity and infirmities.
In Romans 8:37 we are told that, "We are more than conquerors through HIM who loved us". That's a pretty huge statement in and of itself. It's definitely something that should bring hope to anyone facing any sort of adversity! I read an article recently that encouraged the readers to embrace this premise and claim this promise in Rom 8:37. Personally, I think "just conquering" is a pretty huge deal and most people would be thrilled with this alone. However, I do agree this is a promise to claim. There is more for those who take God at His word.
We've all seen many people in the world who "conquer" their disabilities and limitations. The self-determination and "can do" positive attitude that is displayed, inspires us all, but this form of "conquering" takes only faith in one's self. It takes will power, self-determination and motivation...a desire to not give up. These are truly admirable traits to have and they are needed, but they are attributes that we find within ourselves and to really conquer and overcome, we must rely on the Lord, His attributes and His help.The scripture says we are MORE THAN CONQUERORS THROUGH HIM. In my opinion, as a Christian, Jesus desires for us to embrace, accept and welcome our afflictions, trials and adversity. Why? So that we can share in Christ's sufferings and become more like Him. It is also an opportunity for the world to see God work in and through us. We can only do that with the Lord's help, through His strength. It is not our power or determination, but Him working in us! He says in the verse below we should do it "with pure joy!"
James 1:2-4 Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
James 1:12 Anyone who meets a testing challenge head-on and manages to stick it out is mighty fortunate. For such persons loyally in love with God, the reward is life and more life.
If, with Christ's help, we can accept and embrace our affliction and adversity...I would say that we've "more than conquered." If we can learn to see affliction and adversity as an opportunity to experience His grace and to be transformed into His likeness...if we cease to strive and say "Lord, I am going to find joy in you in the midst of this struggle."...then we will find God in ways that we could never begin to imagine! It will strengthen our faith in Him! It will inspire the faith of those who are around us! It will release His power in us. Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or imagine, according to the power that works in us– Ephesians 3:20
One of my favorite scriptures is: 2nd Corinthians 12 :9-10 "But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. ...For when I am weak, then I am strong."
A key factor in the ability to achieve all of this, is trust. We can only come to this place of finding joy in adversity and peace despite our circumstances, if we truly trust that our Heavenly Father loves us and wants the best for us. We must believe that His word is true...believe that His promises are real and for us! The only way you can learn to trust anyone like that, is to know them. That brings us to the heart of it all. God desires all of us to come to a personal knowledge of Him. As we grow in that knowledge of Him, our lives are transformed...our thoughts are transformed and suddenly what we could never do on our own becomes possible because of His strength in us. Phil 4:13 "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."
Here are a few more scriptures that might be of encouragement to you.
1Sam 12:16 "...stand and see this great thing which the Lord will do before your eyes...
Luke 18:27 "The things which are impossible with men are possible with God.
Num 23:19 "God is not a man, that He should lie. Has He said, and will He not do it?
1Chr 22:18 "And has He not given you rest on every side?"
2Chr 20:17 "You will not need to fight this battle. Position yourselves, stand still and see the salvation of the Lord, who is with you,..."
John 16:33 "In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world."
Rom 8:18 "...consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us."
Rom 8:39 "(Nothing can) separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord."
Rom 8:28 "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose."
2Tim 4:5 "...be watchful in all things, endure afflictions, do the work of an evangelist, fulfill your ministry."
2Tim 4:7 "Fight the good fight, finish the race, keep the faith."(paraphrased)
Mic 7:8 "Do not rejoice over me, my enemy; when I fall, I will arise; when I sit in darkness, the Lord will be a light to me."
1Jn 4:4 "(You) have overcome them, because He who is in you is greater than he that is in the world."
Phil 1:6 "(Be) confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ,..."
Phil 4:4 "Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I say, rejoice!"
Helpful Links
http://ezinearticles.com/?Five-Ways-Toward-Accepting-the-Death-of-a-Loved-One&id=499085
http://www.suite101.com/article.cfm/ulcerative_colitis/47027
http://www.mindpub.com/art193.htm
http://youtu.be/GIJADzaNj8k
http://youtu.be/Tl58qufXfYk
HERE'S ANOTHER GREAT VIDEO OF NICK VUJICIC SPEAKING TO ACCEPTING HIS CONDITION at http://www.joniandfriends.org/television/ive-got-questions/
Learning How to Accept Your New Normal
February 24, 2012 at 3:04am
Acceptance
To be able to move on and heal from grief, no matter what the source of the grief, we have to be able to accept our new reality, or new circumstances.
Here are two definitions of the word "acceptance". Coming to terms with something: the realization of a fact or truth and the process of coming to terms with it. 2. Toleration: the toleration of something without protest.
Acceptance is realizing that life has changed and probably will never be the same again. Acceptance is looking toward the future and it's possibilities and not living in the past. Acceptance is adapting physically, emotionally and spiritually to your life's changes. Acceptance is the path to moving away from the pain of grief.
Here are some spiritual thoughts on acceptance, conquering, embracing and overcoming adversity and infirmities.
In Romans 8:37 we are told that, "We are more than conquerors through HIM who loved us". That's a pretty huge statement in and of itself. It's definitely something that should bring hope to anyone facing any sort of adversity! I read an article recently that encouraged the readers to embrace this premise and claim this promise in Rom 8:37. Personally, I think "just conquering" is a pretty huge deal and most people would be thrilled with this alone. However, I do agree this is a promise to claim. There is more for those who take God at His word.
We've all seen many people in the world who "conquer" their disabilities and limitations. The self-determination and "can do" positive attitude that is displayed, inspires us all, but this form of "conquering" takes only faith in one's self. It takes will power, self-determination and motivation...a desire to not give up. These are truly admirable traits to have and they are needed, but they are attributes that we find within ourselves and to really conquer and overcome, we must rely on the Lord, His attributes and His help.The scripture says we are MORE THAN CONQUERORS THROUGH HIM. In my opinion, as a Christian, Jesus desires for us to embrace, accept and welcome our afflictions, trials and adversity. Why? So that we can share in Christ's sufferings and become more like Him. It is also an opportunity for the world to see God work in and through us. We can only do that with the Lord's help, through His strength. It is not our power or determination, but Him working in us! He says in the verse below we should do it "with pure joy!"
James 1:2-4 Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
James 1:12 Anyone who meets a testing challenge head-on and manages to stick it out is mighty fortunate. For such persons loyally in love with God, the reward is life and more life.
If, with Christ's help, we can accept and embrace our affliction and adversity...I would say that we've "more than conquered." If we can learn to see affliction and adversity as an opportunity to experience His grace and to be transformed into His likeness...if we cease to strive and say "Lord, I am going to find joy in you in the midst of this struggle."...then we will find God in ways that we could never begin to imagine! It will strengthen our faith in Him! It will inspire the faith of those who are around us! It will release His power in us. Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or imagine, according to the power that works in us– Ephesians 3:20
One of my favorite scriptures is: 2nd Corinthians 12 :9-10 "But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. ...For when I am weak, then I am strong."
A key factor in the ability to achieve all of this, is trust. We can only come to this place of finding joy in adversity and peace despite our circumstances, if we truly trust that our Heavenly Father loves us and wants the best for us. We must believe that His word is true...believe that His promises are real and for us! The only way you can learn to trust anyone like that, is to know them. That brings us to the heart of it all. God desires all of us to come to a personal knowledge of Him. As we grow in that knowledge of Him, our lives are transformed...our thoughts are transformed and suddenly what we could never do on our own becomes possible because of His strength in us. Phil 4:13 "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."
Here are a few more scriptures that might be of encouragement to you.
1Sam 12:16 "...stand and see this great thing which the Lord will do before your eyes...
Luke 18:27 "The things which are impossible with men are possible with God.
Num 23:19 "God is not a man, that He should lie. Has He said, and will He not do it?
1Chr 22:18 "And has He not given you rest on every side?"
2Chr 20:17 "You will not need to fight this battle. Position yourselves, stand still and see the salvation of the Lord, who is with you,..."
John 16:33 "In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world."
Rom 8:18 "...consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us."
Rom 8:39 "(Nothing can) separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord."
Rom 8:28 "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose."
2Tim 4:5 "...be watchful in all things, endure afflictions, do the work of an evangelist, fulfill your ministry."
2Tim 4:7 "Fight the good fight, finish the race, keep the faith."(paraphrased)
Mic 7:8 "Do not rejoice over me, my enemy; when I fall, I will arise; when I sit in darkness, the Lord will be a light to me."
1Jn 4:4 "(You) have overcome them, because He who is in you is greater than he that is in the world."
Phil 1:6 "(Be) confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ,..."
Phil 4:4 "Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I say, rejoice!"
Helpful Links
http://ezinearticles.com/?Five-Ways-Toward-Accepting-the-Death-of-a-Loved-One&id=499085
http://www.suite101.com/article.cfm/ulcerative_colitis/47027
http://www.mindpub.com/art193.htm
http://youtu.be/GIJADzaNj8k
http://youtu.be/Tl58qufXfYk
HERE'S ANOTHER GREAT VIDEO OF NICK VUJICIC SPEAKING TO ACCEPTING HIS CONDITION at http://www.joniandfriends.org/television/ive-got-questions/
Dealing with what I am at the moment and accepting, adjusting, even embracing it ...you gave me a pithy encapsulation to sum it up. IMO, this naming the sitch will make it easier for me and perhaps others to not only SURVIVE but perhaps even really THRIVE (in growth of faith) seguing into:
"This Is My New Normal".
Bless you!
I will never stop loving them or praying they we will reunite but I have quit trying to contact them. The ugly words I get in retire and sometime the silence is too hard.
How can it be wrong to protect your heart and move forward as best you can?