CHRISTIAN PARENTS of ESTRANGED ADULT CHILDREN Community Group
Estrangement makes it difficult to talk about with family, friends, neighbors and church members. Christians are NOT immune to broken families. Talk about your experiences with those who know how you feel and get positive support through your Christian faith...."In these last days difficult times will come, for men will be lovers of self...disobedient to parents,...
The 2 sisters I am not close with are being VERY judgmental about the whole situation with my ES. My oldest sister, who always has thought she can tell me what to do asked me today "so, what are you going to do about him?" I asked her "what am I supposed to do, he is almost 29?" Her son is a bigger mess than my ES, so I said "You know Jenifer, that is like someone asking you "what are you going to do about YOUR son'?" She didnt appreciate that. She didn't even have the decency to CALL her son to tell him his grandpa had died. I am SO glad the funeral, etc,,is over, I have had enough family to last me a lifetime.
She is mad because she gave my ES $300 in December & he hasn't paid her back..I told her if she had asked me about it, I could've told her not to give him the money..he asked her because I had cut him off from the money flow.
Now she expects ME to pay her back!! Am I crazy or is that ridiculous???
She is mad because she gave my ES $300 in December & he hasn't paid her back..I told her if she had asked me about it, I could've told her not to give him the money..he asked her because I had cut him off from the money flow.
Now she expects ME to pay her back!! Am I crazy or is that ridiculous???
I believe you are right. You should not pay your son's debts. He is responsible for his behavior at this point. You can not fix his life. Only he can. When our youngest son was involved in things at age 24 we went to Families Anonymous. It is nation wide. We were told not to enable them. We would be hurting them that way.
Your sisters do not get a vote in your son's life IMHO. The most we can do for our adult children is pray for them.
I am fortunate to have only 1 sister and we get along very well so I can't imagine pain that comes from a sister acting that way. I do remember the old saying "you can pick your friends but you can't pick your family."
Maybe give her some space to think about everything and she will see it is her own responsibility to deal with your ES but I am assuming she is also dealing with issues with her own son that weighs her down.
The only funerals I don't mind going to are those who I know are dedicated Christians because I know that they are with our Savior and that is nothing to be sad about. They are where there are no more tears, nor grief, or pain for God Himself has wiped these things away. Our pastor always gives a message about the gospel if asked to do the funeral service for a non-Christian because he knows there will be many non- Christians attending. I've been to one of those and it was a message that did not glorify the deceased but instead focused on the need to know Christ while alive.
Funerals today are getting to be almost as expensive as weddings can be - even the cheapest ones are still expensive if you ask me. It is getting ridiculous. The origins of what we see today as a funeral industry did not emerge until after the Civil War when the process of embalming became widespread and more accepted by the general public. Before the mid-19th century, the dead were often displayed in the family home in the "parlor," hence the term "funeral parlor" that is still in use today. Toward the end of the 19th century, private viewing in the home eventually disappeared in favor of using a funeral home. Unfortunately, it seems as though the prevalent thought today is that....the more you spend, the more it is supposed to express how much you loved that person.
Me? I'm going out in a wooden box with no frills. Save the money and give it to charity! LOL