CHRISTIAN PARENTS of ESTRANGED ADULT CHILDREN Community Group
Estrangement makes it difficult to talk about with family, friends, neighbors and church members. Christians are NOT immune to broken families. Talk about your experiences with those who know how you feel and get positive support through your Christian faith...."In these last days difficult times will come, for men will be lovers of self...disobedient to parents,...
If you want to hear it yourself go to: http://instantteleseminar.com/?eventid=36728715
He said that it's rare for the child to truly not care, they don't necessarily want you to suffer. They're working on becoming their own adult. Some do it by pushing the parent away.Anger is a wall against guilt, so they don't feel weak. They don't want to be close to us because their afraid of being hurt again. Mental illness will cause them to think things about parents that aren't true. They can't manage emotions, have unrealistic expectations of parents, and are vulernable to difficult people. They feel their parents give up on them too soon.
The more people they cut off, the more fragile they feel and a need to protect their self-esteem. They think if they have conflict, they'll have to pay too high of a price, they're not strong enough to advocate for themselves, we can't tolerate them being their own person, and we're easily disappointed in them.
We need to let them know we respect their opinion and we want them to advocate for themself; that conflict is normal.
He said that it's rare for the child to truly not care, they don't necessarily want you to suffer. They're working on becoming their own adult. Some do it by pushing the parent away.Anger is a wall against guilt, so they don't feel weak. They don't want to be close to us because their afraid of being hurt again. Mental illness will cause them to think things about parents that aren't true. They can't manage emotions, have unrealistic expectations of parents, and are vulernable to difficult people. They feel their parents give up on them too soon.
The more people they cut off, the more fragile they feel and a need to protect their self-esteem. They think if they have conflict, they'll have to pay too high of a price, they're not strong enough to advocate for themselves, we can't tolerate them being their own person, and we're easily disappointed in them.
We need to let them know we respect their opinion and we want them to advocate for themself; that conflict is normal.
When I told her birth mother what Dr. Coleman told me (DIL has estranged her for 15 years), she agreed completely. There is no cure really for NPD.
Our son loved his family, all his cousins, grandparents, etc. and enjoyed spending time with all of us until DIL came into his life. She forced him to have no contact with any of his family if he wanted to marry her.
In our case, the information in this seminar were things our son hadn't thought of before his involvement with our now DIL.
Our only hope for reconnection is prayer. I know God has a plan; I just have to be patient.