I know this is not always the case, but when my first grandchild was born, that was the beginning of our reconciliation and we had a relationship for 14 years before it happened again.

As you might expect, the attempt at reconciliation wasn't easy but I prayed and sought God's direction in what I should do. I didn't go to the hospital, but once mom and baby were home, I called and asked if could come over. They said, "yes" and I thought that was the beginning of our reconciliation. It wasn't however. After my first visit, my son told me he "wasn't ready". Cannot tell you how devastated I was. And I really believed God directed me, even gave me scripture so, of course, I questioned....."what happened?" What happened was that it was God's timing, not mine. Six months after my visit to their home, I received a call from my es saying that he and dil and baby wanted to come over for a visit. You could imagine my joy.

Each of us has a different story and I would say that only God can advise you. Pray and pray some more, stay in the Word (HE even gave me a story from the Bible as an example of what to do), and keep seeking Him until you know. And, if His answer is "wait".... listen. Whenever I didn't, and went forward on my own in my own timing, it never worked. But He is perfect and He knows. So pray like you never have and stay in the Word every single day.....even if it is one chapter or verse. He will speak to you. Blessings.....

Thank you IronCowgirl for your encouragement and very thoughtful insight.

I am sorry for the pain you are going through. We understand and are here to pray and support you. We must always pray and see how the Lord is leading us. If you do feel led to reach out during this time or once the baby is born then do it. Your ED may have a softened heart as a new mother.

Good advice IronCowgirl! You would think a new baby would soften anyone's heart and want & need their family, but not always. Been there, done that! All I accomplished was more heartache. Lindajoan is right... wait for the leading of God. He will never steer you wrong. After that lesson learned, I have learned to stand still!

I agree to wait for The Lord to guide you julnjim. It's a very painful experience to go through. Please stay in prayer, and spend quiet time with The Lord regularly. I can't imagine enduring this without my quiet time with God.

Agree, pray and listen to God and come here for encouragement. Others may say "oh the baby will change everything, she'll want to see you", but that is not always true. This is unbelievably painful and I teared up reading your post. Also, consider not peeking on facebook, that can add to the torment.

Your responses were incredibly appreciated. I am so deeply touched that you shed tears with me dmw56.
What a bond we have in Christ and with the pain we share.