Since this is all so new and my son has changed 180 degrees, I don't know what to expect. I don't think he would ever physically hurt me but under the influence of his girlfriend, I'm not sure what can happen. All we can do is pray for them and ask God for his guidance and protection. It's all of this new normal that scares me more than anything. These are things I never would have dreamed possible yet here we are. Prayer is what I use in this battle as God is our Fortress and Strength.

I realize your fear! BUT, living in fear is not a way to live. God did not give us the spirit of fear, and perfect love casteth out all fear. We have to place all our trust in Jesus. God gave Satan all keys, but the key to death. Only God has that right. Read Job. Don't allow Satan to torment you with these thoughts. We need to pray and thank God for the hedge of protection that is around all of us who believe and rebuke that spirit of fear in Jesus name! God Bless you and I will pray for you as well for all of us going through this nightmare of estrangement.

There were times in the past 4 years that our ED has done many evil things against DH and I especially near the beginning of the estrangement. Some of her false accusations could have had serious ramifications. God was our defender. I do not put too much past her present BF. He has mental issues. Let's trust the Lord for our safety and protection each day.

I have definitely felt this way about my grandson. He is extremely hateful and has shown little, if any, capacity for empathy or compassion. I do believe he is a sociopath. I feel he is dangerous. One time his mother (my youngest ED) asked him to drive us somewhere that we needed to go. He was not happy about it at all. My husband sat in the front seat next to him and I sat in the back. We live in a very rural area where most of the roads are single lane, curvy and are no passing zones. Well, he drove like an absolutely maniac going well over the speed limit, driving so w recklessly that I was so scared we'd be in a wreck. When we got out of the car, I was so mad at him, I slammed the car door as hard as I could, and he nev er said a word, just peeled out, burning rubber. He is a cold and empty person, so I definitely do not feel any level of comfort when around him.

poodlegirl - I have definitely felt this way about our ECs in the past. Once we even went out of town for a few days after we asked one ES to move out. He was very angry, volatile and unpredictable. We begged him not to buy a weapon, but he did, then he returned it, but now we think he has one again. I also felt this way with ED when she was young and still living at home. We slept with the bedroom door locked and something behind it to wake us just in case. But she is more passive aggressive and more likely to put something in our food etc. Very scary when you're living it. We moved away and have great relief because of the distance. When I hear these stories, like yesterday, it does give me flashes of wondering if ours could ever snap like that. At the moment I think they are all in better places, however, their issues run deep and under stress in the future it will still make me worry about something terrible. Maranatha, come quickly Lord Jesus!

As for both of my sons,I am not afraid physically,but mentally,emotionally i am. My one son always tells me its in my head and my meds need ajusting even my dil,i tell them my meds do not need adjusting its the situation.

When my ED was 14, she wanted to go out with a questionable person. when I said she couldn't go, she reached into the silverware draw, took out a steak knife, and actually raised it up while facing me, then put it back in the drawer. I knew that day she was ill.

edr1961 - What you described, regarding your son and dil telling you your meds need to be adjusted is a common tactic used by narcissistic personality disordered people, also known as "gas-lighting". I learned so much reading about this disorder. I went through the same thing. I've been fine, no mental health problems before the estrangement - I was just my usual happy-go-lucky self, which has always been my temperament. But my youngest ED does have MH issues - most likely bi-polar or borderline personality disorder, according to experts I've spoken to about her behavior. But all of a sudden she texts me wanting to know what is wrong with me (mentally speaking), what meds I take and who my doctor is - that she and her sister demand to sit down with me and discuss my MH issues with them. It's what they do. Those with the MH issues know they have these issues but project them onto those that don't. Sad.

Yes ibelieve your right,i even told that to my son a few months ago,they are very selfish and think of themselves more than they think of my 4yr old gs.Everyone is wrong they are right,

My concern is that DS and his girlfriend and family think they are privileged know it all's who have all the answers to life. When some one disagrees is when things get nasty. I know for a fact that they stole my jewelry when we were away this past summer. That included my mother's and grandmother's diamond rings, some valuable older jewelry and things DH gave me over the years. They just think nothing of taking whatever they want. I have lent them things telling them I wanted them back by a certain time and the items never return. Psychologically I am afraid of them since as you said above, it's always something wrong with me and my meds. I do take pills for anxiety and depression but my doctor sees me regularly and all my blood work is fine. It's not me, it's them but they must blame some one else since they are perfect.

i am on meds for depression,anxiety also not very high dosage and want to stay that way,just was talking to dh and expressed how they have hurt me and i always try to look for a silver lining but i cant see it this time,i am so afraid to let my wall down,my son has changed so much it seems like,he islost and dont know where he is,i dont trust him,and dont believe anything he says or does.I am so upset,i pray to God to please help me,my dh says he is hurt for the way they have treated me,and it hurts me the way dh expresses him self he has such harsh words i dont know how to handle it sometimes.

YES....I really think our SIL would for sure harm us or worse. For one thing he is from India and like I mentioned before here he has physically abused our ED. Our granddaughter told us this when she spent two weeks with us in the summer a few years ago. When we were at their home in CA two years ago she was crying right in front of him after she found out about him going to be with prostitutes. He stood right there with a stone face and did not care how hurt she was. I told him if they divorced she would get the house so he may as well leave. He looked at me with hate and told me "she will NEVER get this house". He does not work, she supports him. He is like the one recently, who brought the women over because she wanted to use him to become a citizen in USA. Our SIL is a citizen of USA now. He used to tell her he was sending money to his dad in India but now I know it was the prostitutes and who knows what else???

So yes, those people have warped minds and try to brainwash their partners....I believe our ED is brainwashed. The last time we saw her she treated us terrible and mean, running me down really bad. We have completely let go of any relationship with her....she won't leave him. I now wonder what is up with her and know those people from that country have a lot of hate in them. His look at me told me exactly what he thought of me. He came over on a school Visa and never left, I worked at that college. Many foreign students do this and that is how they get in....then they disappear.

poodle----I am glad you have protection handy, We do too. I hope all of USA wakes up, this president is letting all kinds of things happen and he has a reason for it.

1 John 4:4 --- Ye are of God, little children, and have overcome them: because greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world.

I am afraid of my oldest son. I have seen him go crazy on more than one occasion.

i disciplined my children, my children have both violently assaulted me. (my daughter an eating disorder, my son a former cocaine addiction) but the emotional abuse has by far be more devastating. there was an article l999 about parental abuse, a young lad took the time and printed it off for me. there are studies showing the entitled generation and the abuse of parents, are living in very troubled times, especially of the mind. these ec are punisher's. i feel like i'm living the movie invasion of the body snatchers. God help us all.

missingourson......that is horrible that they would steal from you....and then blame things on your meds..wow.....at least you are trying to deal with your anxiety which prob came about because of them.....I am terrified of my DIL....not my son....but my DIL ONLY.....she is very violent and volatile.....and refuses to see how bad she is or seek help......so yes I know how it is to be afraid of someone who can hurt you also by lies and accusations ......she has tried that one too..and has physically hurt me.....so I have good reason to fear her....if she was not my sons wife I would get restraining order...but then he would never speak to me again ever.....so I am stuck.....