Gordos, what is it worth really if he comes and treats you disrespectfully, it wouldn't be fun either.
It would end up in hard feelings anyways by the sound of things. We miss what they have the "potential" to be. Not what they are.
By standing up and I know how hard it is, we have to set a standard of respect and dignity for ourselves. We are not doormats.
I can empathesize till the cows come home. My son assaulted me, that's where my eggshell relationship got me, now I am in the courts and him charged. I miss what life "could" have been, but the reality is my son is not of sound judgement. I only miss my granddaughter right now and I hope one day "after" my son takes his consequences that we can mend our relationship. I wasn't perfect either, but I was more than willing to respectfully communicate and he would always fly of the handle. So the relationship was superficial and unacceptable. Its hard to take a stand for what is right, in fact its extremely difficult. But truthfully is there really any other way??!!
God doesn't want animosity he wants our spirits to be at peace. I know I tried and tried, but the situation just became intolerable, so while we all have different situations we all know what our breaking points are.

I'm sorry "we" are going through this.
Hugs sister, we will get through this and I hope better off on the other side.
Let us be thankful of the Christmas season, and to be Thankful to God that we have a Savior, if not our EK at our sides.

Alienated

I know you are right Alienated...we are all pretty much in the same boat.I hate to think of all the hurting moms around the world..esp those in Connecticut. I have to remember that God expects us to stand up for ourselves, but still forgive at the same time. Up until today, I was okay with him NOT coming home, but today, I just feel sorry for him. I pray & pray for him, that's all I can do...

godos....I'm sorry that he made that choice too. This is not the time of the year for fighting - nor any other time really. But, if he can't fulfill that reasonable request, then evidently he had no intentions of showing respect to you. Why feel sorry for that? If he is that out of control then are you not better off spending it alone than fighting on a day that is set aside for remembering the Savior of the World that came to bring PEACE?

I can certainly understand your disappointment but perhaps you weren't prepared enough for him to take the request seriously? He could also be using it as a test for you to see if you will break down and give into taking the disrespect that he evidently intended to dish out to you.

I'm sorry you're "feeling low", but your son should treat you with respect. Alienated & Guels Mom give great advice, I think we all get down at this time of year, because our dreams of what we expect our family to be, is not to be. Sometimes what we want & what we get are 2 different things and it breaks our hearts.

Please have a Merry Christmas, focus on your relationship with the Lord, He loves you, and will never fail you.

You can't change your son, what is in your control, is your response to his actions. Don't let your son ruin your day, when it does get to you, just remember that "You are Loved". I'm praying for you, for your happiness, and a prayer for your son to see his Mother as he should.

So sad to read and I completely understand. dailystreng is so right when she reminds us that the Lord loves us and will never fail us or leave us!