Hello everyone. I don't know why I am posting here, but I feel like God is urging me to tell people about my experiences. First of all I am bipolar and I had two psychotic breaks. However my psychotic breaks felt like near death experiences. I am telling my story only to increase the faith of people who might be struggling. I used to be a very bitter Atheist. My mom has a drug problem and she has put my Dad and I through hell. That is a long story on it's own. Well one day I was in my room and I just said out loud "Jesus if you're real, I will forgive my mom."

Well I got much more than a response. I heard a very clear voice of God "Now you understand my daughter." I collapsed on the ground because the presence of God suddenly filled my room and it was extremely intense. When I told God I couldn't take anymore, he pulled away. That was my first experience. I had a whole intimate conversation with God after that as well, and it was more real than reality. Time seemed to stop and I was in Eternity. I was with Jesus and suddenly there was no doubt in my mind that he was God.

After that they put me on heavy medications that made me lose my enthusiasm. Soon I returned to my bitter atheist self because I no longer felt the presence of God. I was under stress because I couldn't find a job anywhere and I was running out of money (I still am broke and Jobless.)

And I stressed myself out to the point of another psychotic break. But I once again heard the voice of God at the beginning of my break and he told me he was putting me through a test, and trying to prevent another suicide. I was also told that this time I would find the right medication and I did. I feel healed of my depression and suicidal thoughts and I am utterly grateful. I used to be tormented by thoughts of suicide but they are gone. I can thank the medications, but also the intervention of Jesus for my success. I am still poor but it doesn't matter because I have joy in my heart knowing there's a God. So for anyone who is struggling with faith right now, God does care and he does love us. I also had visions of heaven, and a glimpse into eternity and it was amazing. I know some people would think my experiences were due to my disorder. But I know I met God. Amen.

-Krystal