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God’s Guidance for Christians in Conflict
God’s Guidance for Christians in Conflict
by Rev. Dr. Mark D. Roberts
Note: You may download this resource at no cost, for personal use or for use in a Christian ministry, as long as you are not publishing it for sale. All I ask is that you acknowledge the source of this material: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/markdroberts/.
God’s Guidance for Christians in Conflict: Introduction
This is one blog series I wish were completely unnecessary. I wish conflict among Christians were a relatively insignificant problem. I wish we who believe in Jesus could experience the unity he commended to us (John 17:20-24). I wish there wasn’t animosity within churches and denominations.
But all of this is, I admit, wishful thinking. The fact is that Christians often have a hard time getting along with each other. This has been true from the earliest days of the church. The Apostle Paul, who planted the church in Corinth, wrote what we call 1 Corinthians to the believers there principally because of internal conflict in the church. By the time Paul wrote 2 Corinthians, the tension was largely between Paul and his church.
Even in a healthy church, such as the one in Philippi, conflict was a problem. Thus Paul wrote in his letter to the Philippians: “I urge Euodia and I urge Syntyche to be of the same mind in the Lord. Yes, and I ask you also, my loyal companion, help these women, for they have struggled beside me in the work of the gospel, together with Clement and the rest of my co-workers, whose names are in the book of life” (Phil 4:2-3). Two prominent women in the Philippian congregation, people who had been Paul’s co-workers in ministry, were stuck in some sort of conflict such that they needed help from Paul and others to try and get along.
When I was a young Christian, I used to think that the solution to the ills of the contemporary church was to “get back to the early church.” If we could only believe and do as the first believers believed and did, we’d be on the right track. But the more I have studied the early church, the more I have come to recognize the manifold problems that plagued the first Christians. Among these, conflict played a central role.
Perhaps one of the most discouraging things about studying church history, from the first century onward, is to see just how often Christians have been mired in disputes and strife. Sometimes, in our worst moments, we have actually put to death fellow Christians whose theological convictions didn’t measure up to our personal standards. Not a happy story, not at all.
This was not what Jesus intended, to be sure. In his so-called “High Priestly Prayer” recorded in John 17, Jesus prayed:
“I ask not only on behalf of these, but also on behalf of those who will believe in me through their word, that they may all be one. As you, Father, are in me and I am in you, may they also be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me. The glory that you have given me I have given them, so that they may be one, as we are one, I in them and you in me, that they may become completely one, so that the world may know that you have sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.” (John 17:20-23)
A little earlier, Jesus had said to his disciples: “By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another” (John 13:35). To be sure, there are times when followers of Jesus do love each other in an exemplary way. But, far too often, such love is marred by conflict, tension, and outright meanness. And, far too often, we have not dealt with these problems in a loving way.
So, today I begin a blog series that seeks God’s guidance for Christians in conflict. This series will be relevant, I believe, to one-on-one relationships and to denominational disagreements. I will seek to discover and apply God’s revealed wisdom to conflict among Christians. My hope is that when we experience conflict in the church, we will be prepared to deal with it in a way that honors God and strengthens Christian community.
Tomorrow I’ll suggest a place where we might start when facing the problem of conflict among Christians.
Dealing with Conflict Among Christians: One Starting Point
Where should we start if we’re seeking God’s guidance for conflict among Christians? Here’s where my Protestant convictions come strongly into play. We should start with Scripture, with God’s inspired Word. Now this is always a good starting point, the best there is, in fact. But in times of conflict it’s even more essential that we begin with and cling to biblical teaching. There are several reasons why.
First, in times of conflict our natural human emotions often try to dictate our behavior. We feel anger and want to lash out. We feel fear and want to defend or attack. We feel wronged and want to get revenge. Yet if we allow our emotions to guide our behavior, inevitably we’ll simply make matters worse. Conversely, if we tenaciously hang onto biblical teaching, we’ll find the power to act rightly even when our feelings try to drag us in the wrong direction. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve found myself wanting to get even with people who have wronged me. Yet by holding on for dear life to God’s Word I’ve managed to avoid behaviors that would have been both sinful and self-defeating, even if they seemed to be temporarily satisfying. (Photo: The copy of the Gutenberg Bible in the U.S. Library of Congress.)
Second, in times of conflict we must stand solidly upon Scripture because God’s ways of dealing with conflict are generally very different from the world’s ways. When we’re in the midst of some church battle, we’re tempted to adopt the ways of the world. Chief among these ways is the desire to win. We can also be tempted to use human schemes to defeat our opponents. We spin like we’re in the middle of a dirty political campaign. We rally the troops. We get out the vote. We defend ourselves. We play the victim. We undermine our opponents. We conveniently ignore facts that don’t support our side. We hold grudges, and so forth and so on. It will feel natural to us to use the world’s ways to win church battles, and, as we do, the world around us will cheer. But rarely are these the ways of a God who says to us, “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways my ways” (Isaiah 55:8). The world doesn’t have much room for one who tells us to turn the other cheek, who calls us to forgive seventy times seven, and who urges us to imitate his humble, self-sacrificial servanthood. So we need the Bible to show us different ways to operate in times of conflict: the ways of peace, the ways of the gospel, the ways of Jesus Christ.
Third, in times of conflict among Christians, we need the Bible as the source both of practical guidance (here’s how to act) and of theological insight (here’s how to think about God and the church). The biblical combination of ethics and theology helps to shape our thoughts, feelings, and actions. Though this particular blogging series will be fairly practical, it will also be replete with theology, because that’s the way of God’s biblical revelation.
Ironically, I hope this series isn’t directly relevant to your life, at least not right now. But even if your church is in a blessed season of harmony, you may be able to direct others to the biblical guidance I will convey. Moreover, if you take seriously what I will share with you, you may very well help your church stay out of serious conflict. And, if this doesn’t happen and conflict comes, you will be able to be a peacemaker in your own community.
In my next post I’ll examine one of the most important of all biblical passages for discerning God’s guidance in the midst of conflict.
Let God Speak to You Through His Word
Yesterday, I suggested that Scripture should be a primary starting point for seeking God’s will when we’re in conflict with other Christians (or anyone, for that matter). Today, I want to draw your attention to one of the most important passages for discerning God’s guidance for Christians in conflict.: Philippians 2:1-11. On Monday I’ll offer some exegetical observations about this text. Today, however, I want to print the entire passage and then offer some guidance for how to let it impact your heart and your actions. I’m writing specifically for people who find themselves in conflict right now, though I hope you’ll find this to be worthwhile even if you’re not facing such a challenge today.
Here’s the passage from Philippians:
If then there is any encouragement in Christ, any consolation from love, any sharing in the Spirit, any compassion and sympathy, make my joy complete: be of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility regard others as better than yourselves. Let each of you look not to your own interests, but to the interests of others. Let the same mind be in you that was in Christ Jesus, who,
though he was in the form of God,
did not regard equality with God
as something to be exploited,
but emptied himself,
taking the form of a slave,
being born in human likeness.
And being found in human form,
he humbled himself
and became obedient to the point of death–
even death on a cross.
Therefore God also highly exalted him
and gave him the name
that is above every name,
so that at the name of Jesus
every knee should bend,
in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
and every tongue should confess
that Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father.
(Philippians 2:1-11)
In light of this passage, if you’re in the midst of conflict with other Christians, let me urge you to do the following. And, frankly, you might well want to do this even if you’re not in a conflicted place right now.
1. Ask the Lord to speak to you through this section of his Word and through the ministry of the Holy Spirit.
2. Prayerfully, slowly read this passage. Read it at least three times. If possible, read it aloud. Let each word sink in. Be attentive to what God is saying to you personally. (Note: Don’t start applying this text to others and focus on what they need to do. Let the Lord speak to you about you.)
3. As God convicts you, go with it. Talk to him about it. Confess if you need to. Ask for his help to obey if you need to. Take time to talk with the Lord about how this passage should impact your life.
4. If you are able to do so, share with at least one other believer what God has been saying to you through Philippians 2. Be open to encouragement and or correction from this believer (or these believers). Ask them to pray for you as you move to the next step.
5. Act upon what God has said to you through this passage. Be a doer of the Word, not a hearer only (James 1:22). You may find it very hard to do what God wants you to do. Be assured: He will provide the strength you need if you depend on him.
I’m going to stop now. Yes, I have a few things I want to say about this passage. But right now I think I should get my words out of the way. What you need most of all is the Word of God, brought to life by the Spirit of God. My reflections will come in due time, and that time will be tomorrow. But I truly believe that if you’re experiencing conflict with other Christians, and if you take time to prayerfully meditate upon this section of Scripture, and if your heart is open to God, then He will guide you to do what is right and honoring to him. You will begin to see the conflict you’re in from God’s perspective. And you’ll begin to see how you can be an agent of God’s peace at this time.
May the peace of Christ be with you . . . really!
God’s Guidance for Christians in Conflict
by Rev. Dr. Mark D. Roberts
Note: You may download this resource at no cost, for personal use or for use in a Christian ministry, as long as you are not publishing it for sale. All I ask is that you acknowledge the source of this material: http://www.patheos.com/blogs/markdroberts/.
God’s Guidance for Christians in Conflict: Introduction
This is one blog series I wish were completely unnecessary. I wish conflict among Christians were a relatively insignificant problem. I wish we who believe in Jesus could experience the unity he commended to us (John 17:20-24). I wish there wasn’t animosity within churches and denominations.
But all of this is, I admit, wishful thinking. The fact is that Christians often have a hard time getting along with each other. This has been true from the earliest days of the church. The Apostle Paul, who planted the church in Corinth, wrote what we call 1 Corinthians to the believers there principally because of internal conflict in the church. By the time Paul wrote 2 Corinthians, the tension was largely between Paul and his church.
Even in a healthy church, such as the one in Philippi, conflict was a problem. Thus Paul wrote in his letter to the Philippians: “I urge Euodia and I urge Syntyche to be of the same mind in the Lord. Yes, and I ask you also, my loyal companion, help these women, for they have struggled beside me in the work of the gospel, together with Clement and the rest of my co-workers, whose names are in the book of life” (Phil 4:2-3). Two prominent women in the Philippian congregation, people who had been Paul’s co-workers in ministry, were stuck in some sort of conflict such that they needed help from Paul and others to try and get along.
When I was a young Christian, I used to think that the solution to the ills of the contemporary church was to “get back to the early church.” If we could only believe and do as the first believers believed and did, we’d be on the right track. But the more I have studied the early church, the more I have come to recognize the manifold problems that plagued the first Christians. Among these, conflict played a central role.
Perhaps one of the most discouraging things about studying church history, from the first century onward, is to see just how often Christians have been mired in disputes and strife. Sometimes, in our worst moments, we have actually put to death fellow Christians whose theological convictions didn’t measure up to our personal standards. Not a happy story, not at all.
This was not what Jesus intended, to be sure. In his so-called “High Priestly Prayer” recorded in John 17, Jesus prayed:
“I ask not only on behalf of these, but also on behalf of those who will believe in me through their word, that they may all be one. As you, Father, are in me and I am in you, may they also be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me. The glory that you have given me I have given them, so that they may be one, as we are one, I in them and you in me, that they may become completely one, so that the world may know that you have sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.” (John 17:20-23)
A little earlier, Jesus had said to his disciples: “By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another” (John 13:35). To be sure, there are times when followers of Jesus do love each other in an exemplary way. But, far too often, such love is marred by conflict, tension, and outright meanness. And, far too often, we have not dealt with these problems in a loving way.
So, today I begin a blog series that seeks God’s guidance for Christians in conflict. This series will be relevant, I believe, to one-on-one relationships and to denominational disagreements. I will seek to discover and apply God’s revealed wisdom to conflict among Christians. My hope is that when we experience conflict in the church, we will be prepared to deal with it in a way that honors God and strengthens Christian community.
Tomorrow I’ll suggest a place where we might start when facing the problem of conflict among Christians.
Dealing with Conflict Among Christians: One Starting Point
Where should we start if we’re seeking God’s guidance for conflict among Christians? Here’s where my Protestant convictions come strongly into play. We should start with Scripture, with God’s inspired Word. Now this is always a good starting point, the best there is, in fact. But in times of conflict it’s even more essential that we begin with and cling to biblical teaching. There are several reasons why.
First, in times of conflict our natural human emotions often try to dictate our behavior. We feel anger and want to lash out. We feel fear and want to defend or attack. We feel wronged and want to get revenge. Yet if we allow our emotions to guide our behavior, inevitably we’ll simply make matters worse. Conversely, if we tenaciously hang onto biblical teaching, we’ll find the power to act rightly even when our feelings try to drag us in the wrong direction. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve found myself wanting to get even with people who have wronged me. Yet by holding on for dear life to God’s Word I’ve managed to avoid behaviors that would have been both sinful and self-defeating, even if they seemed to be temporarily satisfying. (Photo: The copy of the Gutenberg Bible in the U.S. Library of Congress.)
Second, in times of conflict we must stand solidly upon Scripture because God’s ways of dealing with conflict are generally very different from the world’s ways. When we’re in the midst of some church battle, we’re tempted to adopt the ways of the world. Chief among these ways is the desire to win. We can also be tempted to use human schemes to defeat our opponents. We spin like we’re in the middle of a dirty political campaign. We rally the troops. We get out the vote. We defend ourselves. We play the victim. We undermine our opponents. We conveniently ignore facts that don’t support our side. We hold grudges, and so forth and so on. It will feel natural to us to use the world’s ways to win church battles, and, as we do, the world around us will cheer. But rarely are these the ways of a God who says to us, “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways my ways” (Isaiah 55:8). The world doesn’t have much room for one who tells us to turn the other cheek, who calls us to forgive seventy times seven, and who urges us to imitate his humble, self-sacrificial servanthood. So we need the Bible to show us different ways to operate in times of conflict: the ways of peace, the ways of the gospel, the ways of Jesus Christ.
Third, in times of conflict among Christians, we need the Bible as the source both of practical guidance (here’s how to act) and of theological insight (here’s how to think about God and the church). The biblical combination of ethics and theology helps to shape our thoughts, feelings, and actions. Though this particular blogging series will be fairly practical, it will also be replete with theology, because that’s the way of God’s biblical revelation.
Ironically, I hope this series isn’t directly relevant to your life, at least not right now. But even if your church is in a blessed season of harmony, you may be able to direct others to the biblical guidance I will convey. Moreover, if you take seriously what I will share with you, you may very well help your church stay out of serious conflict. And, if this doesn’t happen and conflict comes, you will be able to be a peacemaker in your own community.
In my next post I’ll examine one of the most important of all biblical passages for discerning God’s guidance in the midst of conflict.
Let God Speak to You Through His Word
Yesterday, I suggested that Scripture should be a primary starting point for seeking God’s will when we’re in conflict with other Christians (or anyone, for that matter). Today, I want to draw your attention to one of the most important passages for discerning God’s guidance for Christians in conflict.: Philippians 2:1-11. On Monday I’ll offer some exegetical observations about this text. Today, however, I want to print the entire passage and then offer some guidance for how to let it impact your heart and your actions. I’m writing specifically for people who find themselves in conflict right now, though I hope you’ll find this to be worthwhile even if you’re not facing such a challenge today.
Here’s the passage from Philippians:
If then there is any encouragement in Christ, any consolation from love, any sharing in the Spirit, any compassion and sympathy, make my joy complete: be of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility regard others as better than yourselves. Let each of you look not to your own interests, but to the interests of others. Let the same mind be in you that was in Christ Jesus, who,
though he was in the form of God,
did not regard equality with God
as something to be exploited,
but emptied himself,
taking the form of a slave,
being born in human likeness.
And being found in human form,
he humbled himself
and became obedient to the point of death–
even death on a cross.
Therefore God also highly exalted him
and gave him the name
that is above every name,
so that at the name of Jesus
every knee should bend,
in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
and every tongue should confess
that Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father.
(Philippians 2:1-11)
In light of this passage, if you’re in the midst of conflict with other Christians, let me urge you to do the following. And, frankly, you might well want to do this even if you’re not in a conflicted place right now.
1. Ask the Lord to speak to you through this section of his Word and through the ministry of the Holy Spirit.
2. Prayerfully, slowly read this passage. Read it at least three times. If possible, read it aloud. Let each word sink in. Be attentive to what God is saying to you personally. (Note: Don’t start applying this text to others and focus on what they need to do. Let the Lord speak to you about you.)
3. As God convicts you, go with it. Talk to him about it. Confess if you need to. Ask for his help to obey if you need to. Take time to talk with the Lord about how this passage should impact your life.
4. If you are able to do so, share with at least one other believer what God has been saying to you through Philippians 2. Be open to encouragement and or correction from this believer (or these believers). Ask them to pray for you as you move to the next step.
5. Act upon what God has said to you through this passage. Be a doer of the Word, not a hearer only (James 1:22). You may find it very hard to do what God wants you to do. Be assured: He will provide the strength you need if you depend on him.
I’m going to stop now. Yes, I have a few things I want to say about this passage. But right now I think I should get my words out of the way. What you need most of all is the Word of God, brought to life by the Spirit of God. My reflections will come in due time, and that time will be tomorrow. But I truly believe that if you’re experiencing conflict with other Christians, and if you take time to prayerfully meditate upon this section of Scripture, and if your heart is open to God, then He will guide you to do what is right and honoring to him. You will begin to see the conflict you’re in from God’s perspective. And you’ll begin to see how you can be an agent of God’s peace at this time.
May the peace of Christ be with you . . . really!
Many of you know that there has been conflict here in our group and I remained quiet, as I was seeking the Holy Spirits guidance through the Lords word. I dislike conflict very much and personally am weak in the area of handling it well. I am not the original founder of this group and was asked to do it. I prayed many times to the Lord over if I should be one of the leaders and He answered affirmatively.
I make mistakes and don't always handle things well. I have bad days where I am in pain and my emotions get the best of me..I am in the process of being sanctified as the rest of you are.
Communicating in this manner in this group is a learning lesson, of course face to face there will be less chance of misunderstandings, and the entire group of people will not be privy to every word. We try to balance freedom of speech with consideration for all others. We are not perfect and we are all different and so my advice is to take some time before posting something and try to check it over with our Lord Jesus first.
Thank you for reading and I pray for all of you, for your health and welfare on a regular basis.
Hmm... I haven’t met a single Christian anywhere who is without fault or sin. Who has not engaged in some conflict or another with other. Probably because I deal with real people and not saints or people who think they have elevated above others just because they are Christians or believers.
And I do believe that one we are attacked by someone, even if it is a so-called fellow Christian, we have the right to defend ourselves. The right not to become a victim to someone else’s abuse or injustice. I am not hear on this Earth to be a victim of anyone’s regardless if the are a Christian or not.