Oh my. That sounds similar to the 'gut' feeling of doubt that I had about my husband before I married him. My husband even struck me one time while we were dating, he cried his eyes out and camped out in my front yard for 3 days crying and begging my forgiveness and swearing he would never do it again. And he didn't until the day after we were married, from then on it was physical and verbal abuse for the next 20+ years. He nearly killed me several times, and broke my back, I'm still dealing with problems from that injury and it's a miracle that I'm not crippled. I sought refuge in the Lord and my husband has stopped the physical violence and now only on occassion gets verbally abusive. But I went through hell on earth and if I could go back in time I would have listened to my gut feeling and the doubts I had in my mind. They were red flags, my husband also said he believed in God before I married him.

It is important to marry your best friend. If you don't feel like your boyfriend is your best friend that you can totally trust, or if he has put fears or doubts in your mind for any reason I would strongly caution you against marrying this man. Once your married things change alot, they own you then and they can control you completely. He's on his very best behavior now while your dateing him and if his very best makes you wonder then your spirit and the Lord are trying to tell you something and it's a warning sign. Another sign is that you posted about it here, you have doubts and I wouldn't ignore them Sweetie. Make sure you have witnessed how your BF reacts to very stressful situation before you marry him, you don't want to find out later how he is going to react to big problems because marriage is hard. You should also closely observe how he handles money, what his family is like. He will likely later on have alot of the characterists of his parents, which might not be aparant now. Plus you aren't just marrying him you are marrying into his family and the wrong in-laws can make your life miserable. Does he have a temper? If so it's gonna get alot worse once your married. Does he ever seem selfish, or self-centered. Is he always kind and considerate? Does he totally understand you? Does he ever criticize you? He needs to be able to pass all those tests with flying colors. If he doesn't love the Lord with all his heart and mind then you would be marrying an unbeliever and he won't be governed by anything except his own will and Satan will be able to take him captive at his will. In other words he could act out in very evil and mean ways if Jesus is not Lord of his life. Don't marry him and hope that he makes Jesus Lord of his life later on.

I understand about how hard it would be to quit the relationship if you feel you love him. Love can blind a person to all common sense and can feel to unbearably painfull to just walk away from. But that doesn't mean you have to marry him. I would pray and pray and wait until I was absolutely sure what the Lord was saying to me. And if you have any clues to the fact that you would be marrying someone you will be uequally yoked with to then God has given you the answer already, don't marry him. If God is just now revealing Himself to your boyfriend then your boyfriend has a long way to go spiritually speaking so I wouldn't give myself and my life away to him if I were you. You will know if God has revealed Himself to a man or not by his words and actions. In my opinion the Lord would never say to anyone 'go ahead and marry them because I am revealing Myself to them'. You need to give this a whole lot more time Hun. I can tell from what you said that you already realize that love can cause you to do alot of wishfull thinking that you might (probably) be really sorry for later if you listen to it.

I am not jumping into anything right away and I dont wanna end things right away either. I have panic disorder so a lot of my worries are just in my head. I plan on getting that under control before I make any serious decisions. I just dont feel like it is time to give up. We have had a lot of rough times but we are making it through and things are getting better. Me having panic attacks has put a lot of stress on the relationship and and I have never met anyone that could truly be there for me friend family or boyfriend so I dont blame him for not understanding what I am going through but he is trying to understand and help me. I am just as much of the problem. I just wish I has clear answers cause hate the constant worry that I live with daily.

I'll pray for you healingtears. I went through years of panic attacks and did everything I could try to do, like control my thoughts, counceling, take the anti-anxiety meds. It finally got alot better but I think it got better because of the promises of God and the comfort He gives me is so reassuring. And I think the Lord had to heal my physically alot too,I think some nerve damage occours with prolonged panic and anxiety or any momumental stres that just goes on too long. It also affects the metabolism and immune system and no telling what else, probably causes some vitamin deficiency. I still have bouts of PTSD from time to time when my husband gets verbally abusive which I can keep those symptoms under control if I withdrawal from people and take a Valium and focus totally on the Lord.

Annie spoke the truth to you, but people want to ask the questions then when they hear the truth they won't listen, it just amazes me but I suppose when your young you make your own road to travel on then you realize it was the wrong road and if you have problems now you will have more. Remember we either learn from our mistakes or we keep making the same ones.

Opps, I also wanted to tell you that I can relate to what you are saying because it affects my relationships with other people alot too and you are right that most of them don't understand. When I'm having PTSD symptoms I can only talk briefy with the most consistantly calmest of people because everything else feels like it is a threat and might cause me to get alot sicker.

Leeann, that is good reasoning, what you said. Because a person with an anxiety problem really needs to protect themselves from more damage. I'm glad she is not rushing into anything. After hearing what she said about her boyfriend and not knowing for sure if God is or even has revealed Himself to him or not, she should be very careful.

Annie, you and Angela are a blessing to me and the others, I wish there was a church with both of you preaching and teaching, I would never miss that is for sure. You both have the gift of teaching and reaching out to others. In this very hard life the only thing that is for sure and true is the gift of God's holy word and you both know it so well. God bless and heal any hurts and pain is my prayer for you and all of us here.
I was thinking today about many things and it came to my thinking that sickness is evil but that doesn't mean the person is, life is so hard and I know people think sickness is from God and perhaps it is but for some reason I don't believe that, I'm sure he uses our pain to bring about good, I can see Jesus now walking and touching those that are ill, just like He did when He was here, what a awesome God we have.

Leeann thank you so much for your encouragement to me. I agree with you about Anglea being a blessing and you are too Leeann. You have the sweetest spirit, I know I should be more like you, like Jesus commanded us to always love on another and you are the best example I know of who is like that.

I don't understand alot of things either, about sickness and bad things that happen. I think mostly they are attacks from the enemy. Although some scripture says that the Lord will allow things to happen sometimes to get our attention, or change our attitude or to show Himself strong on our behalf. It can all be very confusing sometimes and sometimes I think that we are just in the world and it's all temporary anyway, nothing here is going to last forever and we live in a cursed world. It's hard to get through it unscathed. None of us are going to make it out of here alive either, unless we go in the rapture. Sometimes we reap what other people sow. But we are Gods army and soldiers for the Lord so He hand picked us to live in this day and age of much evil around us. And so I add my prayers along with yours for everyone here to healed from pain and sickness and to be strengthened in the power of His might and that the Lord protect all of us from harm and danger in Jesus name. Praise the Lord God is so awsome! Amen to that Leeann!

So no one on here believe that God can change people? And I talked with my boyfriend today and he opened up more and told me he used to be really into God but as he got older he started to question things. He doesnt understand why bad things happen to good people and why children die for no reason. These are questions he needs to find answers to and I am choosing to show him a loving God and help him through his questions. If we dont work out we dont work out but I want him to know God is good.

Healing i wanted to offer you a few things. First of all, we all need to be praying for your bf. YOu should not marry him if he does not profess faith in Christ. There is alot of scripture to reference this but the bottom line is, if u do that, ur life with him will likely be very hard.

Also, you did not mention the condition of ur relationship. Are you doing it Gods way or your own? If you are sexual with him, you should stop this and God will then increase his work to honor your prayers for your boyfriend. We know our sins are covered in Christ so if u are sexual ur sins are covered however, ur bf's sins arent covered, so that would be causing him a great deal of harm. All of Gods laws and gifts to us are all for our benifit, so that we can lead happy and abundant lives. I live jsut such a life, and God did completely change me.
Come back to us and let us know ur bf's name, we will all pray for him with you for his salation for God to call him more clearly and also work in him that his heart might become fertile ground for the seeds of Gods word. I am allready praying for him and you too in these matters.

Thank you for your faith and love for our God. Do all u do in His name. Praise God continually.

Healing, Nothing is impossible with God and He loves your BF just as much as He loves me and you but people have their own will and remember feelings are very fickle, you can feel this way today, feel another way in an hour, I just want you to be joyful and at peace and it comes from Jesus, He Is the Prince of Peace, if you love and are committed to your BF that is a good thing but just remember you can not change anyone only yourself with the Lord's help so if you want him as is, it could be a hard road, life is hard anyway but it will be much worse. It is a mystery why good people get sick and evil people keep on doing really bad things to people but we just have to trust in Jesus and ask for His Mercy because there is really no answers but I do know whatever state we are in we can thank and praise God because He is our helper and we all need help. I don't thank God for my sickness and trouble but I do thank Him while I'm going thru it, we thank Him IN not FOR, I heard a preacher teach on this and it sure helped me. God Bless you and yours and you can get much teaching from others here to help you as they also help me. Take care sweetie

Marriage is hard even if your both Christians. I would not rush into anything..let the Lord lead you and guide you. Marriage is forever and forever is a long time with someone who don't have the same values as you. When unevenly yoked..can pull you down and away with your relationship with the Lord. Praying that his eye's will be open to the truth of Jesus Christ and accept him as his personal Lord and Savior. Praying for you both!! Read God's word and trust in what he says!!!

Two things:
1st) A story: My brother was on the verge of marrying an unsaved woman. He kept praying and praying and pryaing for God to confirm that this was the right choice, but never heard anything that would confirm it. Finally he went to the pastor of his church to find out why God would not confirm this or speak.
"I've waited, and I've waited," my brother said to him, "and still God says nothing."
"Well perhaps that's God's message," said the pastor, "He has nothing positive to say about this message."
My brother broke up, within weeks found a wonderful Christian woman and within a year was married, within a year.
2nd) !st Corinthians clearly says not to marry someone who does not share your faith equally - do not become unequally yoked - a situation you just described. Do NOT marry him; do not even discuss Marriage. Discuss faith, but go no further. He is not ready and neither are you.
I will pray for you.

I think it is called missionary dating, when you date someone to witness to them. I have one friend that led her boyfriend to the Lord, they got married, and have been married very happily, serving the Lord for 25 years. On the other hand, some people have nothing but problems, because the person only makes a commitment to please the person. I think you need a lot more prayer, ours, yours and your church's about this issue, and please keep telling him about how God loves him. Whether you remain together or not is not the big issue, but him coming back to the Lord is the most important thing in the end.

That is so true Angela, some can be happy and some are very miserable but like you said the most important thing is coming back to the Lord and that makes all the difference in this world and the best in the end.
God bless you, it feels so good to have Jesus in our heart and mind, what an awesome helper we all have in Him and He is always there for all of us, wonderful comfort.