Cheaters Anonymous Community Group
This is a support group for cheating spouses looking for understanding and strength. Betrayed spouses are welcome to post ONLY if they can do so in a supportive manner (no bashing...these posts will be deleted), and please do not comment on 'Cheaters Only' posts.
There was a lot in this OM that he had and my husband didn't. There was an obvious difference between the two, I guess that is one of the major reasons for my decision to have the A. he loved adventure and danger and so did I. We had a lot of the physical qualities in common, maybe not so much the emotional or spiritual at least not yet, it lasted only two or three weeks before it could become emotional. I know this is selfish but there are a lot of things he did and had that I wish my husband did and had. Am I the only one who feels this way???
BUT....overtime, after the "I'm in a new relationship and this is so great and he's so cool and wonderful" wears off, a bit.....I began to see certain things that made me go "hmmmm..." and after awhile, but after I was stuck in it, things start to make you think....this is a man cheating on his family, taking his pay and spending it on motel rooms, lying and lying and lying (Granted, I was doing the same thing and that's part of the struggle). Something somewhere has to give. Healthy relationships are based on honestly and openness, not in secrecy and lies.
And you are right, my H didn't have some of the same qualities....my H didn't spend his pay for motel rooms, he didn't hide his phone/computer from me, he was always, always consistent in his unconditional love for me, he was honest. He had integrity and devotion to me and our family. Overtime, somethings outshine others.
OM was great for a thrill, a dangerous thrill.....but in the end...not a keeper.