Tonight, he (OM) called me out on so many things, I had to take a step back & catch my breath. It literally floored me. I was basically shocked into silence. I had to hang up, I couldn't even talk. It's like he was Dr. Fuckin' Freud with all of his analysis & insight into me. I don't know if he just got lucky & guessed or if I am really that easy to read, but wow. I am still a little shocked by all he said & how well he knows me. He said things that I haven't even admitted to myself. And I really didn't think he was all that perceptive, ya know? But apparently he's been paying attention, picking up on little things I'm saying & doing and has been building up a case for a long time.

I believe it was his intention for me to realize that he's the only one who truly knows me and what I want and what I deserve....and that I would abandon ship immediately and go running to him.

Actually it sorta had the opposite effect. I felt more than a little defensive and protective of my life with my H. And a little insulted although I don't know why, everything he said was true. He's not a con artist & wasn't just fishing & hoping he'd say something that would stick or something that would hit a nerve. This is truly stuff that he'd thought about for a long time.

He said he didn't care if I ended up with him or not, these are issues I needed to address before I could be with anyone. Yes, all true. Things I know very well to be true, but tend to keep repressed & just ignore them.

All that has me going down a path I don't want to be on, because denial is such a lovely, comfortable place.