notmyself, you are amazing! It's crazy how clear things get once that fog has lifted.

We cleared up some stuff last night, mostly how H avoiding conflict resolution puts bricks in the wall and how much closer we could be without that wall in the way. Feeling much better today.

Thanks Fiber :)

Glad to hear things are working out for you!

Dear Family, Last night when I was in such deep despair, weeping, praying, calling out to The Goddess, somewhere in all that mix I thought about all of you who are also struggling to maintain NC. And your strength gave me the strength to stay on that path! Still 3/9 since last contact. It feels wonderful to write that!

Perhaps I am earning redemption. By opening myself and feeling deep pain and deep sorrow the way I felt when he became a serial cheater in 2008, I can carry her pain for her by ending the affair before she finds out about it!

I'm on day 2 of no contact. He doesn't know that I'm ignoring him yet. I'm trying to decide what to tell him when he starts to worry.

Like you Tantric, I want to end this before she finds out.

Glad things are going better for you today Fiber, and congratulations on your 2 weeks of strength notmyself!. :)

A word of advice love... TELL him you're going NC. I didn't specifically tell my MM that I was going NC, but I had threatened to do so if he persisted, so I just assumed he'd figure it out when I stopped replying to him. But when I did try to go NC, he continued to text me constantly, as if he was confused. May as well just clue him in to what you're doing. It saves a whole lotta headache. I finally sent him the NC email, spelling it out for his stupid ass, and he stopped bothering me for a while. I now suspect that he's been reading my posts here, and saw that I was feeling weak this weekend, and then decided to bait me today after almost 2 weeks of NC. And I fell for it, stupidly. I have to start back at square one again. And if you think he's going to start worrying because you're not replying, you're really setting yourself up to break, because he's going to send you crap like "OMG r u ok? Do I need to come check on u? I'm really worried about you." Blah blah blah, that will make you cave in because you feel bad that you've made him worry needlessly about you. Been there, done that. Sorry if I'm coming off a little blunt. I've had a very bad, but very eye-opening evening. Good luck to us all in our path to redemption.:)