Cheaters Anonymous Community Group
This is a support group for cheating spouses looking for understanding and strength. Betrayed spouses are welcome to post ONLY if they can do so in a supportive manner (no bashing...these posts will be deleted), and please do not comment on 'Cheaters Only' posts.
The wording you use and the sound of sheer despair in your post, make me thing that only a professional therapist can help you move forward. You are not condemned.
I very much hope that you can start taking those steps and begin to rebuild and begin to turn things around for yourself.